[dmak]

While I do agree with being able to make small lies, but why would you tell someone whose waiting for you that you are 5 minutes away if you are clearly not. Maybe it's just me, but when someone says 5 minutes, I don't expect 10, 15, or 30. I expect 5 minutes. This is especially true in Asian cultures.

[personlurking]

One of the worst offenders is Brazil. When living there, it was common to hear "I'm on my way" (to an agreed meeting point at a specific time) but that could mean they actually are on their way or that they've just got up from the couch and will go take a shower, choose what to wear, maybe have a bite to eat and then think about transportation.

Knowing this, the trick was either to not take specific times seriously or to give a fake meeting time (earlier than the actual one) so the person gets there on time.

[at-fates-hands]

When I was in college, my Native American roommate introduced to "native time" which is the same as you related it while you were in Brazil.

If he had no set time to meet, he'd say he would be there around "native o' clock" which meant he would be there at the time +/- 30-45 minutes. If we agreed to a specific time, he would be there on time. It really helped me and I learned a lot about how Native American culture operated while we were roommates.

[tolt]

As a norwegian living in Peru I used the same methods. I started to tell my peruvian friends that we were meeting at a resturant instead of a street corner. Different cultures have different understanding of time.

[paganel]

It depends on the culture. When I hear "I'll be late 5 minutes" that usually means 10 or 15, "10 minutes late" means an actual 20 or 30 minutes, while everything higher than 20 minutes could mean an actual hour. I live in Romania.

[Fuxy]

That's why i set myself a rule of whenever somebody says I will be there in 5 minutes I translate it to give me 5 minutes to show up if i don't forget about it.

And I hold everyone to it. If you don't show up in the amount of time you specify I'm gone.

I'm Romanian too I just hate wasting my time. My friends learned that really quickly.

[untog]

What if they get stuck on the train? There are other, non-lazy reasons for being late.

If I'd taken a 30 minute train ride to come and see you, been delayed by 10 minutes, then find you're gone when I arrive I don't think our friendship would last very long.

[icebraining]

That was valid before cellphones, nowadays I expect people to call/message if they're late. I suppose that reading Fuxy's post literally implies that no such exception is allowed, but I assume it's not meant to be an inviolable rule.

[untog]

Don't move anywhere with an underground subway system then...

[icebraining]

Our underground subway system here in Lisbon has cellphone coverage.

[rokhayakebe]

If you don't show up in the amount of time you specify I'm gone.

Respect.

[dmak]

"I'll be late 5 minutes" does not have the same set of expectations for "I am just five minutes away" which is what kanche said.

[dalore]

I'll be late 5 minutes means you're 10 minutes away (5 minutes to get there on time and 5 minutes of being late).

[xux]

The point is, it doesn't matter. It's none of your business why someone lies.

[dmak]

Actually, the point is to manage expectations. Instead of saying I'll be there in 5 minutes, it would be better to say I am going to be X minutes late. There's lying to hide your business, but there's also lying and being inconsiderate of other people's time.

[Squarel]

Or, it could be your best estimate, based on current traffic conditions or walking speed.

I always underestimate how long it will take,this does not mean I am lying, it means I am bad at guessing how long it takes me to walk/drive/sit in a train somewhere

[lmm]

In which case surely your friend getting an automatic, accurate version of your position from facebook would be better for both of you?

[qubex]

He might've been closer than he was making out to be. Yours is an unwarranted assumption.