As somebody who sits at computer all day, who is too cheap to buy equipment, too embarrassed to be seen exercising by others, and who hates the idea of devoting an hour a day to physical agony, this appeals to me.
Look at Leangains and combine that with Starting Strength. I put in 2 and a half hours per week (that's 10 hours per month. total) and eat 1-2 large meals a day consisting of just about whatever I want. I'm thrilled with the shape I'm in and best of all it's been really easy to get here once I stopped focusing on the kinds of time-wasters this article describes and instead started focusing on the Right Way (compound exercises and leangains eating guidelines).
1) you have a serious, unaddressed medical condition (please seek help!)
2) you're trying something far beyond your normal activity level. There's no rush, work up gradually and your body will adapt. If a walk around the block is a challenge, start there. Repeatable training sessions over time is what makes change, not beating yourself up in the name of 'health'.