[Udo]

Being bald is a huge stigma. Simply put (if overly generalized): most women find bald men very unappealing. I started losing my hair in my mid-twenties, and incidentally this was the last time when a woman was interested in me. Of course, some people can compensate for this, but apparently I can't. I probably shouldn't write this publicly, but I had some success going to parties with a wig. Really! So yeah, baldness needs a cure.

It's debatable whether it's an illness, however there are some findings that suggest the underlying condition not only affects follicle cells but also prostate tissue, leading to a higher chance of developing cancer. But even if there were no ill effects, a cure would still enable bald people to lead a normal life.

That being said, I don't believe this cure exists. There are good preventative drugs, but it's highly doubtful any medication could actually restore dead follicles in humans. Those effects on mice are very likely not transferrable.

[presidentender]

Hear me out, my chrome-domed friend.

This man, the women would not find appealing. His appearance reduces his status: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_VlmHNP9So5Y/Sm86i7qHqLI/AAAAAAAACe...

In holding on to the effectiveness of his remaining fertile follicles, he fails to display the very might and youthful vigor he seeks.

This man, on the other hand, the women love: http://filmpopper.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Patrick-Ste...

This is not only because men improve with age (to a certain point), but also because he cuts his remaining hair very short. He is, as Stephen King once described a character, "unabashadly bald." His confidence is such that he does not cling to the ghost of locks he lacks.

Another example: http://www.philosophyblog.com.au/images/alain-de-botton1.jpg as opposed to http://metkere.com/images/alain-de-botton-thumb-500x356.jpg

Now, I would encourage De Botton to cut his hair even shorter than in the second picture. But by cutting it as short as he has, and shaving the straggly portions up top, he has improved his appeal by indicating his comfortability with the situation.

You might also note a certain Mr. Jason Statham and that fellow who used to be called The Rock.

[Udo]

> Hear me out, my chrome-domed friend.

Thanks for making me laugh :-)

Yes, I do shave my head as well. Sadly, I still don't have the charisma, the fame or the good looks of Patrick Steward. Like I said, some people can pull it off, but not that many. And what if Patrick Steward had the choice? Chances are, he'd opt for a full head of hair and probably even more women would find him sexy because of it.

Also, I thought Sinéad O'Connor was quite attractive without the hair. That doesn't mean I would recommend it for 99% of the women either.

On a personal note, two women told me point blank they'd be attracted to me if I had hair and others have made remarks about how important nice hair is for a man. Sure, it would be great to have other qualities to compensate for this, but since I don't it apparently comes down to hair over baldness.

[thaumaturgy]

There is a (possibly apocryphal) story that, when ST:TNG was to begin filming, Stewart was being encouraged to use a wig "because baldness would have been cured by the 25th century"; his response was that baldness shouldn't be a social stigma in the 25th century.

I couldn't quickly verify the story, but, as someone whose gradual pattern baldness can be most gently described as "hilarious", I appreciate it even if it's not true.

I also think -- and I'm about to be a lot crude here -- that male baldness is a little like breast size for women. Sure, guys will notice average-to-larger sized breasts, but there's a lot more to how attractive they think a woman is: posture, attitude, a smile, for example. Is baldness a disadvantage? Sure. Does it, by itself, make you unattractive? Nah.

[Udo]

I'm not sure it compares to breast size. For instance, I really like women with smaller breasts, the larger ones just don't seem very aesthetic to me (especially with no clothes on).

Compared to that, baldness is a style that may look good on a few men; it may look neutral on a few more. But the overwhelming majority of men would be better off (dating-wise) with a full head of hair. All other things being equal, having hair is a plus.

Many people are surprised to hear this, but huge breasts can actually be a turn-off to many men. However I never heard a woman say: "I'd find him attractive if only he was bald, that full lustrous head of hair just doesn't do it for me".

[Mz]

Many people are surprised to hear this, but huge breasts can actually be a turn-off to many men. However I never heard a woman say: "I'd find him attractive if only he was bald, that full lustrous head of hair just doesn't do it for me".

Many people are surprised to hear it because it rarely gets said. I believe you are the first man I have heard state that he prefers smaller breasts. Just because you don't hear women say "If only he were bald..." doesn't mean there are no women thinking it.

I will also note that women tend to talk less about men and their physical attributes than men do about women and their physical attributes. Women are generally not in a good position to pursue sex for mere fun and typically need to consider the possibility that, oops, she might wind up pregnant and then it will matter a good deal more if he is decent, loyal, has a reasonable income and so on. I will also note that lots of women like older men and older men are often losing their hair. So I think that is indirect evidence that some women are perfectly happy to get with a man with less hair.

I'm sorry this is such a huge issue for you. But I don't think your argument really holds water.

[Udo]

> I will also note that women tend to talk less about men and their physical attributes than men do about women and their physical attributes

This has not been my experience.

> I'm sorry this is such a huge issue for you.

It's not, actually. Mainly I just enjoy the discussion.

Actually, you make an interesting point. I believe there is a social norm involved that tells men they have to like large breasts or else they're gay/weak/whatever. I do know a few men who are really and credibly into huge pendulous breasts, but I also know some who just try to conform to the "standard" outwardly and privately they prefer them smaller.

So your point is that women prefer hair because being bald is a social stigma, being an analogous process to the stigmatization of preferring small breasts? I'm not convinced, but it's an interesting thought.

[arbitrarywords]

I will also note that women tend to talk less about men and their physical attributes than men do about women and their physical attributes

I often wonder if this is a generational thing. This seems to be true of the women I know my age (in their mid 30s, but this has been true when younger as well), but I am also friends with a couple of groups now in their mid 20s and they are very happy to talk about the physical attributes of the guys they know to a level of detail and intimacy that I would never feel comfortable talking about with my male friends.

[georgieporgie]

> I never heard a woman say: "I'd find him attractive if only he was bald, that full lustrous head of hair just doesn't do it for me".

I have. I've read it, and I've heard it in conversation. I've also heard some women prefer short men, fat men, etc.

[FooBarWidget]

Good looks? I'd say Patrick Steward is average looking at best. Any charisma he has comes from his behavior, which is something I believe anybody can change given enough effort.

[ciupicri]

> any charisma he has comes from his behavior

And his movies.

[rdouble]

The haircut is exactly the same in both alain de botton photos.

[presidentender]

I assert that it is millimeters shorter in the color photo, and that this is an improvement.

[rdouble]

Either way, he's the kind of guy who would look better with hair.

[Groxx]

No super-scraggly comb-over.

[nextparadigms]

I once read that "Baldness is a weakness, but shaving bald is a choice", or something like that. Women find baldness as unhealthy, not necessarily in a rational manner, but unconsciously.

So maybe you should try shaving bald and getting a bad boy look with a goatee. Women who dig that look will like you. There's a market of women that like that look on a man.

Trying to look good through other methods will help too, like going to the gym, and dressing well. Women associate strong bodies with health, and dressing well with success and self-confidence.

And don't act like this is affecting you, especially if you'll shave. Act like you did it because it makes you look very good, and others around you will start believing it, too. If you look at that Picard picture above, you can see that he acts as if baldness looks good on him, and his self-confidence is showing, which is attractive to women.

[Udo]

May I ask if you're actually bald yourself?

[adrianwaj]

You should try a really cool hat or beanie. Did your stress levels rise in your mid-20's? Do you remember what it was precisely?

[SandB0x]

There's truth in the meme: hit the gym. You can be George Costanza or you can be Vin Diesel/Bruce Willis/Jason Statham. Your choice.

[kenjackson]

George Costanza was no slouch in the dating category. Just sayin...

[kenjackson]

most women find bald men very unappealing

Unless the man is black. In which case being bald seems to not be a net negative at all. Unfortunately, becoming black is probably harder than getting hair.

But for future offspring, if your hairloss is genetic, you can have a half-black child and put them in a better position. Although society tends to view blacks less favorably in general so the tradeoff here is still not a no-brainer.

[Udo]

> Although society tends to view blacks less favorably in general so tradeoff here is still not a no-brainer.

I'm not so sure about that. Granted, where I live there are really really few black people, but I observed they are generally very successful with women no matter whether they're bald or hairy. And I overheard women talk about the advantages and the cuteness of black guys. Heck, a girl friend of mine even kept going on and on about wanting to have "chocolate-colored babies". So, yes, I'd probably choose being black over being hairy if that were possible.

[kenjackson]

I didn't mean in terms of attractiveness to females. They seem to do fine there -- that I agree.

I just meant in terms of everything else, like the research showing that an identical resume with just different names (one black and one white sounding) the white sounding name will get many more call backs.

So, yes, I'd probably choose being black over being hairy if that were possible.

Maybe I missed you stating you were hairy and bald before... it's an odd combination, but not uncommon. I'd love to know why evolutionarily this is so common.

[Udo]

>> So, yes, I'd probably choose being black over being hairy if that were possible.

> Maybe I missed you stating you were hairy and bald before...

No, I meant I am neither. But if I could choose one trait, I'd probably opt for black instead of full-head-haired. Probably. It'd be a close one.

> it's an odd combination, but not uncommon. I'd love to know why evolutionarily this is so common.

I believe the reason for general body hairiness, baldness and susceptibility to prostate cancer may be a mutation to the Dihydrotestosterone receptors. Or maybe there is just more of the hormone to begin with, I forget.

[Dn_Ab]

Sadly I can attest to this. Disparaged by every society western, eastern and I strongly suspect even Africans themselves.

[Dove]

most women find bald men very unappealing

Really? I know for a fact that there are women who are crazy about bald guys in particular. And I know that in men, maturity is a good thing, not a bad thing -- you have male sex symbols of actors who are pushing 50. And there's the association between baldness and confidence.

I guess your experience trumps my intuition, but I find it surprising. I'd think, on balance, baldness would be a benefit.

[chc]

There are also women who are crazy about dudes with questionable hygiene, crippling addictions and spotty employment histories. I still wouldn't recommend it as a dating strategy. Pointing to outliers proves nothing. Nor, for that matter, does pointing out that some older men can pull off baldness when the problem affects younger men and women as well.

[Dove]

Oh, I know none of that proves anything -- neither does the original poster's experience at parties, or my personal read as a woman that it's a slight positive. I'd be more curious about the data.

Though, another data point -- I've never heard a woman say, "eew, he's bald," the way they might talk about someone being fat, dirty, or excessively old. I've never heard it come up as a negative, and I have heard it come up as a positive many times before.

I don't really have any hard data to contribute to the discussion. I guess I just wanted to make sure you weren't getting your opinion on what "most women" find attractive from Rogaine commercials. ;)

[adrianwaj]

Be grateful you don't have yellow teeth. I can think of other physical characteristics that'd fare worse for you than baldness in terms of creating negative unconscious signals in others. I also think that even congenital conditions can be reversed through epigenetic change, but the awareness needed to do this is superhuman.

[georgieporgie]

What? Being bald is awesome!

Baldness is caused by excess testosterone (not the muscle-building kind, unfortunately). It's associated with maturity and power. The best thing a bald(ing) guy can do is get in decent shape. You don't have to be Arnold, but a strong, bald guy exudes masculinity (look at Picard).

You don't have to waste time with barbers or hairdressers. Just buzz what remains every few days. You're automatically considered lower-maintenance and more masculine because of this.

You don't have bad hair days.

The only things about baldness that suck are sunburns (this is actually the worst thing about going bald, because you're exposed but can't just slather on sunscreen), and hitting your head on stuff. Hair provides a bonus inch or two of sensory input which helps you avoid banging your noggin.

Being young (25-ish) and bald(ing) is less fun, but a lot of the shallow negativity goes away when 50% of your friends start losing their hair by 30. Best of all: the ones who lose it later haven't learned to cope with it, and look hilariously desperate just as you're getting extremely confident.

[Udo]

Imagine there are two doors.

Behind door 1, baldness. You'll be bald and have a high risk of getting prostate cancer.

Behind door 2, keeping your hair. You'll have a thick, awesome mane to call your own and to do with as you see fit for the rest of your life (including shaving it off occasionally).

So you're telling me you prefer to go through door 1, right?

[georgieporgie]

Yes. I never much liked having hair. It seemed too fussy, high-maintenance, got squished under my motorcycle and bicycle helmets, and made my self-image very unpredictable.