The core of the problem is right there in the language of the article. As a user installing an app, I want to use it to help me with some problem or task I have. Here are things I absolutely don't care about: "user retention", "engagement", "winning me over". You shouldn't need to win me over; if your tool is useful, I will use it. If notifications are timely and relevant, I will enable them.
I often get the feeling that people making mobile apps have a sales mindset of their users being cattle that needs to be milked, and then act surprised that the cattle doesn't obey.
That's fantastic, and I have to say that I treat apps the same way. There's no question that push and other notifications are going to be used for [insert marketing buzzwords], but the core question is who are these notifications intending to benefit - the user or the app sending them? I think that good companies know they can accomplish their goal without being obtuse by using notifications to help vs. sell.
We discuss this exact issue in one of our upcoming pieces, the one focusing on users, and we touch on it in the marketing one as well. You'll have to wait a couple days for it though. :)
I like the way you crystallized those questions. I'm very interested in the coming pieces, I'm curious how you compare the two point of views (of users and app makers), which I believe are in conflict today.
I often get the feeling that people making mobile apps have a sales mindset of their users being cattle that needs to be milked, and then act surprised that the cattle doesn't obey.