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by was_hellbanned 4269 days ago
I'm not saying this to be negative, necessarily, but something struck me in this essay, so I grep'd it. There are 47 instances of "I", by my count.
3 comments

>I'm not saying this to be negative, necessarily, but something struck me in this essay, so I grep'd it. There are 47 instances of "I", by my count.

You already have 2 instances of 'I' in a single sentence (not counting the one in quotes). So on average you're ahead of her already.

Why acknowledge sample size when snark is on the line?
It should be expected from this kind of personal blog post to be about one's own story, rather than ideas or outward advice. I see nothing particularly negative with that.

There are 48 instances of "I", 19 of "my", and 6 of "me". So on average 90% of sentences have one instance.

I see nothing particularly negative with that.

I found it distracting and it struck me as lazy writing. Apparently, though, you can't criticize writing style on HN submissions.

So, are you saying it to be negative, unnecessarily?
Yep its stereotype / baiting but always possible an ounce of truth[1]. the worst mistakes to make are ones that let other people typecast you. so maybe its semi-constructive.

eg, how many instances of "team"?

cmd+f=(team)=1

_______________

Here’s my story:

I left my role at Facebook 2 years ago to build women.com. With wide eyes and beginners confidence, I struck out on my own. I crafted my vision, wore a hoodie, and tried to raise a seed round on a dream and a deck. After 3 months of fund raising, I received term sheets (pre-product and pre-tech <>team<>), but success was fleeting. My partner and I hit the skids, split up, and ended our partnership.

However, this was my dream and a couple of speed bumps weren’t going to crush it. I decided to bootstrap and get a working MVP into the hands of users.

--------------------------

Although this contextual snippet may also explain a bit more regarding both observations. The word 'team' only appears within a parenthetical--and even then only within a vignette of previuous failure.

perhaps, even if nothing but for PR purposes, this type of presentation may be improved by being more even handed going forward?.

This just seems like a leadership coaching pont. If she were in another similar/leadership role (non CEO) it would still be relevant.

[1] http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2012/08/27/are-modern-p...