[spitx]

Courtesy without consequence, clout or wherewithal is a dud.

Let me unpack that a bit:

People walk all over courteous people especially when they wield no social clout or when the person is of little consequence, in general.

Courtesy is too often taken -- in North American circles these days -- to be a dose of deference paid in advance for a future (and usually much larger) reciprocal dose of consideration or favor of some kind.

In short, unless you wield considerable worth ( of some kind ) no one's going to rule in your favor -- and against a much more formidable party -- owing to your courteousness.

It's unfortunate.

[tomjen3]

How is me saying good morning going to mean that everybody will run over me?

Don't mistake curtesey from not standing up for your rights or agreeing to things you don't actually agreed with -- a "no, sorry I am not going to be able to come in on the weekend" is curtious, yet also standing up for your self -- "I don't work weekends" accomplish the same, but is less curtius.

[spitx]

I think some of the confusion in this whole thread would go away if people submitted their takes on where ( for them ) courtesy ends and firmness or assertiveness or strictness in demeanor towards others begins.

Where exactly are they willing to end their train of courteous acts and begin being very stiff in their gives and takes with society.

We tend to hold important / formidable / consequential people higher in regard than nice / courteous / generous people.

It is very very rare that one finds those both diametrical qualities in the same person.

A person is either a degree more assertive than he or she is courteous. Or alternately a degree less assertive. Never the same degree in both.

I'll go as far as to say that there can be no one like that.

That degree makes all the difference in how he or she is perceived and weighed.

As they say, some people are admired and liked and others are feared and viewed at, in awe.

I will leave it to you to decide which of the two is more durable and desirable.