[lelanthran]

> And now I need to either disable everything or figure out how to turn that off for her.

Why?

I tell me 6yo "That's for adults only, children are not allowed to use it" and not have to worry.

Sure, he'll push boundaries here and there, but with some things he knows "No means no" and doesn't push those boundaries.

I have literally tested this: left a cookie on the table (that he wants) and told him "You can eat that cookie after you finish the thing you are reading" and left the room.

Teaching kids to not succumb to their instant-gratification instincts is part of being a parent.

[justanotherjoe]

You tested it, i doubt you authored it. A paternal twin can have one with good impulse control and another who's more instinctual. Even in the same family and upbringing.

[kakacik]

At the end both will have to live in same society, and this society will not care whats their background and issues. Perform as expected and get reward, or otherwise not so much.

Everybody can be taught some degree of behavior even if it may require different amount / type of effort, I refuse to believe it ain't true apart from most extreme cases.

[lelanthran]

> A paternal twin can have one with good impulse control and another who's more instinctual. Even in the same family and upbringing.

Sure it happens, but it's unlikely.

It's why kids from certain cultures achieve better academic success on average than kids from other cultures, on average: the environment matters a lot.

[galkk]

It’s okay to pat yourself on the back sometimes, but you have 0 idea about me/my kid, if she’s neurotypical or neurodivergent.

So I suggest to keep unasked parental advices or expectations how other kids should behave to yourself.

[lelanthran]

> So I suggest to keep unasked parental advices or expectations how other kids should behave to yourself.

Forget it. Not gonna happen, on a story about kid's development, in a thread about lack of impulse control.

Sure, there could be physiological reasons for a given child to have a lack of impulse control, but in practice most of a child's characteristics are going to be from the environment.

[slowhorse]

If we agree that a child is a product of their environment, we have to extend that same grace to the parents (and parents’ parents ad infinitum). They are also products of their environments, genetics, and upbringings. Turtles all the way down. It’s unrealistic to expect parents who were given different tools, different neurobiology, and different levels of support to all produce children with identical levels of impulse control. The playing field isn't level.

It’s hard to parse the tone in comments like this, and I’m sorry if am off the mark here, but a little more compassion and consideration makes life and everyone better.