[zahlman]

The webpage linked is an example of everything I wish people would stop doing in web design.

Fortunately, at the bottom there is a link to the "technical documentation" (https://squeezlabs.github.io/handcrank/) which is vastly improved (aside from being light-mode-only and linked from a dark-mode-only marketing page). It also gives me much more interesting information (specifically: models that can apparently run acceptably on a Pi 5).

Please let me read your content with a scrollbar that works the way scroll bars are supposed to, rather than turning everything into a weird slide show where you don't actually know when the next slide is coming. Please let me just click on buttons that look like links to more information, without JavaScript.

[alansaber]

Why can't technical people appreciate that us, the silent majority, love having our scroll hijacked? I can't remember the last time I used a scroll bar to navigate a website, but using it to navigate between choppy javascript keyframes fills me with joy.

[lelandfe]

This isn’t scroll hijacking

You can scroll normally, with all your favorite keys, or go super fast to the bottom

It’s just scroll animations. Bad ones, admittedly.

[mrandish]

> just scroll animations. Bad ones

Scroll animations, post-grid floating voids, bouncy house dampening, hyper rounded... everything. These are the 50s Chevy fins of today.

I've enjoyed working with some great designers over the years, Stanford D-School and even wild-raised. All the good ones intuitively steered clear of trends destined to be era-stamp tropes. They'd say, "I can already hear the ghosts of design-future mocking me: 'That's so early-AI' and 'Yo, the mid-20s called and wants their bento grid back.'"

[1shooner]

>trends destined to be era-stamp tropes

This page was designed for today, for making it to HN, not 'the ghosts of design-future'.

[cj]

> You can scroll normally

Except you can’t.

I scroll down, and the content of the page doesn’t move as expected.

[ProllyInfamous]

Just use your page_up/page_down keys, and you can skip all the stupid/excessive scrolling requirements.

[janderson215]

Now that iPhone has switched to USB-C, I can plug in my Apple Extended Keyboard directly without needing a dongle. It’s like magic.

[arethuza]

I now have visions of an Apple Extended Extended Keyboard that comes with a crank...

[DrewADesign]

It’s nothing new. In fact, many of the comments on this site were made by keyboards with cranks.

Er… I meant to say cranks with keyboards. Sorry. It was a rough weekend.

[wpm]

The real question is does the power button on the AEK still work on iOS?

[ProllyInfamous]

You have to also hold down `ctrl` [+power], but yes.

[TurkTurkleton]

Not even an ADB-to-USB dongle?

[ProllyInfamous]

Thirty years ago, Apple made a translucent green ADB "keypad" which had a small LCD display (perhaps only two lines of text?) – marketed towards academics, it allowed students to learn touch-typing without the distractions of an entire computer.

Once you were happy with your touch-typed document, you then plugged the "keypad" directly into your Mac's ADB (keyboard/mouse) port... and the thing would sit there and manually re-type your composition into the computer's texteditor.

----

Education needs such "reduced tech" to return to teaching. Think of this one as a "more advanced typewriter" – although I own a few of those, too, and they're fantastic for pure composition.

[Natfan]

how do i press these buttons on my android phone?

[Joe_Cool]

Connect Keyboard, Press PgDn.

Or what I actually use for ssh on the road: https://github.com/klausw/hackerskeyboard

Google kicked it from their store because it still supports older Androids but it still works just fine on the latest versions. It's on F-Droid.

[ProllyInfamous]

Is there really no PgDn on a phone?!?

I don't use them, but that is surprising! I would program one of my theoretical phone's physical side buttons to handle PgDn/PgUp [†] – similar to my old Kindle's layout. Do phones still have side volume buttons (e.g.)?

[†] Thanks for the better styling, than my former Page_Up &c

[butlike]

If they're not scroll hijacking, then we're just jacking it ourselves. Think about it.

Thanks, web designers <3

[lukan]

"love having our scroll hijacked? "

You are the silent majority?

No doubt non technical people have different UX experience than tech nerd, but I have seen plenty of "normal" people curse at artsy fluffy design, that made known navigation skills useless and nobody likes their time wasted.

[latexr]

Pretty sure your parent comment was being sarcastic. Why else would they write “choppy javascript keyframes fills me with joy”?

[lukan]

Well, I missed that word, but my irony/sarcasm detector has lately been a bit uncalibrated by the current zeitgeist.

[psygn89]

The "choppy" JS keyframes helps give it a cinematic and authentic feel. /s

[loire280]

I agree this type of web design sucks. It's been common for more than a decade - I remember Apple getting criticized for using this on the product page for the old "trash can" Mac Pro in 2013, and it was already widely used back then.

However, it seems pretty clear to me they did this in service of a joke - you have to "crank" your scroll wheel to get to the content, just like you have to crank this device. I think it's funny...

[zahlman]

> you have to "crank" your scroll wheel to get to the content, just like you have to crank this device.

I actually didn't consider that interpretation.

(I also almost deleted the comment, definitely didn't expect it to blow up like this.)

[gchamonlive]

Calling this web design is giving it too much credit. This is just a glorified marketing pamphlet, which is fine for its purpose.

[Chrise_N]

boo wendy boo. i liked it.

[gchamonlive]

Who's Wendy?

[snypher]

It's a quote from a 2008 South Park episode; https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breast_Cancer_Show_Ever

[niko323]

Great prop for a Black Mirror episode about AI use in a post-apocalyptic world. Everywhere you go, all you hear is brrrrr..brrr..brrrr followed by people mumbling.

[SunshineTheCat]

Choosing "form over function" has been the hallmark of bad design since flash and I don't see that tradition changing anytime soon, even with AI.

[pbronez]

Yeah this is a better link https://squeezlabs.github.io/handcrank/

[squarefoot]

Totally agree on the atrocious landing page. The technical one is much better, although the power supply circuit by using a resistive balancer and a linear regulator wastes some good power for nothing.

[larodi]

Twas probably also prompted… to pile irony over...

[trueno]

yea i can't stand this. im not so boomer i want every webpage to be like. times new roman white background and just using <p></p> and bulleted lists, but idk i cant even put a finger on what im not enjoying here. think it's possibly using scrolling as a way to try and force me to read through stuff. jokes on them, i can't read. not giving me the agency to click around into info that interests me drives me nuts, chances are im just gonna keep scrolling at 1000mph and eye scan until i see what im looking for virtually zero chance im going to sit through the experience of every carefully designed scroll-slide they've tried to present to me here.

[duskdozer]

Alright, I'll be the boomer and say that's what I want every webpage to be like. If you want to customize it you can bring your own CSS or download someone else's. The modern web is a nightmare of user-hostile time-thieving behavioral manipulation and our brains would be better off without it.

[neonstatic]

This website is satire, right?

P.S. I agree with you 100%