[alfiedotwtf]

I’ve always wanted to be an astronaut, but yeah… pass.

Weird a silicon-like pants that strapped up so there was no leaks (like fisherman’s pants), that has a vacuum you attach (almost catheter style) isn’t used. Actually now that I think about it, it’s weird that astronauts aren’t using catheters 24/7!

[NooneAtAll3]

catheters are very uncomfortable

also apparently an infection risk

[gcanyon]

More like an infection certainty. Don't ask me how I know :-(

[XorNot]

I mean this has also been a problem for fighter pilots as well. The "piddle packs" for F-16 pilots are implicared at least one crash due to the complexity of using them.

[1] https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1991-03-23-me-542-st...

[scarier]

To be fair they're pretty easy to use as long as you don't have to fly an airplane at the same time...

[1] (NSFW lyrics!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jd9_RffdmBA

[the_af]

Forget about pee, I always wondered about fighter pilots in one of those long, multi-hour flights, what happens if they really need to go number 2? I suppose they self-select as people without this kind of problems, but it can happen to anyone really.

I suppose in an emergency they just shit their pants, but I wonder what the ground crew says when they touch down.

[scarier]

Honestly this isn't something people select for at all--by the time you've made it through that many rounds of selection you aren't going to let GI issues keep you from the finish. I've heard of some creative solutions to the problem involving safing the ejection seat and getting out of your gear, but I don't really believe any of them. If you think it's a significant risk, you basically have two options: talk to the squadron flight surgeon and get medically grounded, or wear a diaper. Almost everyone is too proud to do either of those things, so a number of pilots have call signs related to shitting themselves in flight. Yes, everyone will make fun of you after the fact--if you're a decent person, you'll at least clean out the cockpit yourself.

[WalterBright]

I suppose you could avoid eating hours before a mission, and not eat gassy foods.

[scarier]

That's one option, although for longer missions your preparation generally needs to start the night before and I wouldn't recommend flying on an empty stomach (unless it works for you, but it makes most people more susceptible to airsickness). There isn't one consistent method that works for everyone--I think the book Sled Driver has a section where they talk about physiological preparation for SR-71 flights, and the only consistent habit the crew had was NOT eating the "traditional," low-residue steak-and-eggs breakfast.

Good news for gassy food lovers is the cabin pressure changes make everyone fart, there's no one else in the cockpit to hear or smell you, and even if there was it'd be loud and they'd be wearing an oxygen mask. Little victories.

[WalterBright]

I don't pack liquids when flying as the lowered air pressure forces the liquid out of the container. Factory sealed is ok.

[cpgxiii]

Imodium also does wonders for slowing things down and avoiding bowel movements, provided you use it carefully and infrequently such that you don't totally mess up your normal gut functioning.

[the_af]

I wonder if hunger can affect your focus and reflexes though.

[WalterBright]

If missing a meal causes that, I suspect we would have died out as a species long ago.

[mr_toad]

in WWII they had to avoid serving gassy foods to bomber crews because at high altitudes intestinal issues could go from uncomfortable to lethal.

[WalterBright]

I didn't know that! But I do know that crews got eggs before flights. Nobody else did.

When RAF pilots went to the Soviet Union to help the Soviets, when the first frost came the pilots were horrified when the women brought out big vats of fat and ladled it out. But after flying in those cold temperatures, they realized the fat was just the thing to keep them warm!

[ozim]

F16 pilot on radio with airliner.

Doing barrel roll, twist and speed up - radio to airliner „see buddy can you do that?”

Airliner „wait a moment” - some time passes nothing happens - airliner „hey buddy you seen that?” - f16 „what? Nothing happened” - airliner „I went to toilet on the back, took dump, made myself a coffee and strolled back to cockpit”.

[asdff]

Surprised they don't just let them piss on the seat like the bike leg in triathlon