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by rubicon33 110 days ago
Genuinely curious as someone who wants to improve… what the hell do you talk about?

I’m trying to picture the random people I encounter while walking my dog, for example. Neighbors who I don’t know. That’d be a great place to start up a convo as I walk by but I draw a complete blank.

0 skill in this.

2 comments

The weather? Do some self disclosure? Or make something up? Be silly?

"oh it's such a nice day innit? It's a shame the lizard people won bingo but we'll get them next time eh?"

Be silly, get a laugh, and hopefully things unfold from there. Give a compliment! Or share something you're excited about. Imo Self-disclosure is the simplest route towards spurring conversation.

Think of conversation as a medium through which gifts are given. Through giving gifts, bonds are forged.

There are two basic topics:

1. Talk about them. Start by paying attention to them. Then when you notice something that was clearly an intentional choice on their part, say something nice about it. Listen carefully to what they say, and follow up in response without filtering yourself.

2. Talk about us. Notice some aspect of experience that you are both sharing. The weather is the most popular and safest topic.