[bluGill]

Speaking at a funeral like that is an odd custom.

Note that custom for funerals comes from the local culture and customs of how previous funerals are run. So that it isn't to you is just a reflection on your culture, other people come from different cultures where such a thing is not normal and because it is not normal- for their culture - it harms their meditations which would be done in the way they have grown up doing.

As such I'm not making a statement of right and wrong for your culture, only that in OPs culture it is wrong and so asking for someone to speak like that was in fact wrong on the part of whoever asked. Whoever asked may well have come from a different culture where this behavior is normal and so made a mistake by not recognizing that they were in a different culture!

[mulmen]

> Speaking at a funeral like that is an odd custom.

According to you. I’d be surprised if such an opportunity wasn’t presented.

> As such I'm not making a statement of right and wrong for your culture,

Except to call it odd.

> only that in OPs culture it is wrong and so asking for someone to speak like that was in fact wrong on the part of whoever asked.

You brought up culture.

This was clearly a case of an open mic. Nobody was asking anyone to do anything. It’s an opportunity to do so if you wish.

[bluGill]

> According to you

No, according to what happened in that instance. If this was normal in the culture of that family someone would have gone to the mic.

Do not confuse my culture with the culture in question.

> I’d be surprised if such an opportunity wasn’t presented.

Which is a reflection on your culture.

> Except to call it odd

Again, odd in terms of that one particular culture.

> This was clearly a case of an open mic

A case of open mic in a cultural situation where an open mic was not supposed to happen.

[mulmen]

I guess we drew different conclusions. To me lack of optional participation doesn’t imply the offer was inappropriate. Calling this cultural requires a much narrower definition of culture than I would use.