[giantg2]

"You weren't going to be taking care of any other responsibilities during your normal 9-5 hours, so that should have no bearing on the week you take off;"

Have you ever been married, had kids, etc? Pretty much any time I take off of work, it involves catching up on projects, chores, or parental responsibilities during the day. It seems the vast majority of people I've spoken to tell of similar situations.

[soulofmischief]

Well, I have specifically avoided having kids at this stage in my life so that I may climb out of the poverty class first. I'm one abortion deep already. I was not as fortunate as 99% of the people in this little isolated corner of the internet.

I was homeless from 16 to my early 20s. I suffer from multiple traumas, both physical and mental. I have ADHD and bipolar disorder. I've had sciatica, degenerative disc disease, gout and other issues since my teens. Most days I can barely walk. When I do have kids, I'm not going to get to be the dad I want to be, running around and playing with them. My parents are abusive drug addicts who were not present in my life, so I was raised by other extremely abusive people instead, who kicked me out into the streets for being atheist. So malnourished as a child that my friends would make fun of being able to see the bones in my face and body. I spent years living homeless on scraps of food.

I have to advance my career. Every single thing is stacked against me, trying to make me fail. I don't get the luxury of deciding if I want to take a week off to do so. It's a matter of survival, and I have very purposefully structured my life in such a way that I have a shot in hell at one day raising a child above the poverty line.

Believe me, this is not a matter of me not empathizing with others or understanding the complexities of life. It's a matter of prioritization and commitment. If I can make time to learn, anyone can.

And on top of all of that, I do in fact have to provide for my sister and her four young, expensive children, because she doesn't have anyone either. I don't get much free time, man.

[tarsinge]

I'm sorry you had to go through all of this. I think your bias is your responsibility is 100% financial so is aligned with always spending more time for your career. For most people financial/career responsibility is only a part, ignoring the rest is as impossible as you putting your career aside.

[soulofmischief]

That's a good point. I do experience the boundaries, I spent the majority of the last 8 years alone and was solely focused on work and hobbies. It was a very productive time for me. Now that I'm in a longer-term relationship again, my productivity has seen a major reduction. It's exacerbated by the fact that I am extremely productivity-focused, but my significant other wants to relax in her free time.

I'm still learning where I should set boundaries on both sides of the field, and this will probably be something I continue to struggle with for some time.