[littlelady]

I cannot overstate how odious I find opinion. Yes, people with ADHD need structure and accountability. But they don't need more shame or punishment.

Shame is malignant. It is an unproductive feeling that hinders people from seeking out accommodations that would help them.

This idea of punitively shaming people with ADHD is doubly asinine, because people with ADHD often suffer from rejection sensitivity dysphoria[1], which already can make them sensitive to embarrassment and prone to having low self-esteem. Emotional dysregulation[2], another "fun" part of having ADHD makes it hard to recover from the experienced rejection.

Some research is more focused on self-regulating aspects of ADHD, as opposed to relying solely on medication[3]. This source is focused on pediatrics, but self-regulating therapies exists for adults, e.g. DBT.

[1]: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24099-rejecti...

[2]: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/25065-emotion...

[3]: https://www.cdc.uci.edu/research/

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> I cannot overstate how odious I find opinion.

Yet...

> RSD isn’t an officially recognized medical condition. It’s also a condition for which there’s limited scientific research available.

> https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24099-rejecti...

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> This idea of punitively shaming people...

It's more about ensuring they appreciate the severity of the deadline.

If I tell a non-ADHD person to try their best to meet the deadline, they might get it done or might not and need a little extra time.

If I tell an ADHD person to try their best to meet the deadline, they might have not started at all, and end up falling far behind, or start making excuses because they are captivated by another task.

There are so many times where fear of repercussions from an imminently looming deadline gave me the initial momentum to put everything else aside and channel my focus to deliver.

But every time this happens you want to say "I just need more time because I started late because of ADHD"...and if the boss says "sure that's okay, take your time"...the motivation dissipates and you are back to tasks piling up.

I can only conclude that ADHD people need a shorter leash regarding scope and stricter deadlines, and not a comforting presence to reduce the pressure.

I am very open to hearing criticism of this approach.

But I think it's actually cruel to not be tough with someone and let their performance drop to a point they have to be fired which is the inevitable consequence. If someone cannot deliver then they cannot be kept around. If someone has 6 months to prove themselves...do you think with less deadlines and less strict deadlines they will have more chance of success? I think it just adds more risk and stress to themselves.

[littlelady]

RSD is a term used to explain a behavior. It doesn't have to be a medical diagnosis for it to be something people experience.

> It's more about ensuring they appreciate the severity of the deadline.

People with ADHD are aware that there are consequences for missing deadlines, so aware they've coined the phrase "ADHD Tax"[1]. Shaming doesn't motivate people, especially people who have issues with motivation in the first place[2]. It just causes them to withdrawal.

> If I tell an ADHD person to try their best to meet the deadline, they might have not started at all, and end up falling far behind, or start making excuses because they are captivated by another task.

Telling someone to "try their best" doesn't actually address the problem their having.

Folks with ADHD aren't always just distracted. There are a number of factors at play with ADHD: poor memory (e.g. often "out of sight, out of mind"), poor organizational skills, and often time-blindness make it hard for people with ADHD to structure their lives. All of these things fall under "executive function"-- which is impaired in people with ADHD[3]. Ex: someone with ADHD might spend a week working on some random detail that doesn't matter, because they think it's important.

Deadline extensions are only one type of accommodation, but imo they don't really address what the person is struggling with.

There a multitude of other accommodations. This may include letting an employee wear headphones, or having a "do not disturb" sign (that is actually respected), or partnering with an employee with especially good organizational skills. Allowing them to block out a few hours of the day where they will not respond to phone calls or emails, etc...

For projects: assistance with breaking down tasks and setting priorities paired with frequent deadlines can combat overwhelm and help with consistency. There are lots of ideas out there, here's a particularly helpful list[4]. Do not micromanage-- you'll make it worse.

> I can only conclude that ADHD people need a shorter leash regarding scope and stricter deadlines, and not a comforting presence to reduce the pressure.

The most helpful accommodations will depend on the individual, but now you have lots of ideas. Of course, they hinge on the employee feeling comfortable enough with you to actually discuss what they need.

[1]: https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-tax-financial-wellness-mone...

[2]: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/longing-nostalgia/20...

[3]: https://www.additudemag.com/7-executive-function-deficits-li...

[4]: https://add.org/adhd-workplace-accommodations-guide/

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> assistance with breaking down tasks and setting priorities paired with frequent deadlines

Pretty much what I am arguing for.

Deadlines have to matter.

> someone with ADHD might spend a week working on some random detail that doesn't matter, because they think it's important.

No one is like "oh, thanks, it was just a matter of working on this thing, my bad, I lost track of time". It's a totally arduous process to abandon this task you are enjoying and drag yourself kicking and screaming to work on what you should be working on...which will be pain inducing. You need a way to get through this pain.

[littlelady]

Your response demonstrates you didn't engage with my response. ADHD is not a character flaw, it is a disability.

1. More deadlines for smaller chunks does not imply that the deadlines are stricter; it's about preventing overwhelm and helping with time-blindness.

2. Focusing on the wrong thing is not (always) about "enjoyment", so much as it's about being overwhelmed, bored, under/overstimulated, or being unsure of what one "should" be working on.

3. Your wording, particularly "kicking and screaming" reveals your disdain for people with ADHD. You are not "very open suggestions" on accommodations as you claim to be.

Here's a list of books about ADHD: https://www.additudemag.com/slideshows/adhd-book-recommendat...

Here's an article, if you can't be bothered to read a book about it: https://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/adhd-wish-you-knew

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> Your wording, particularly "kicking and screaming"

I am describing myself.