[Muromec]

HR are employer's cops and every cop-related advice applies, starting with "don't volunteer information". At least with managers in a big tech corp you have the same goal to pursue and failures to share. With HR it's either a script or a cop.

[lukan]

"every cop-related advice applies, starting with "don't volunteer information"."

I strongly disagree to that, but that is a different debate. (if you want my take: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34447138)

And with HR it can be the same. If the HR have the guidelines of making the employes happy - then you absolutely can share information with them, making planning easier - with the result of a better outcome for everyone. Like when the wife will give birth. "So hey, concratulations, good to know, so we can plan around it" - if it is a good company. If it is a company who don't give a damn and see every person as replacable in an instant, then this is a different scenario and the rule of not giving them anything does apply.

[Muromec]

>And with HR it can be the same. If the HR have the guidelines of making the employes happy - then you absolutely can share information with them

It can be, but it requires a skill of reading the room and knowing nuances in a situation of information asymmetry. The combination of information asymmetry and hr people, being agents of the big corp and not caring about the outcome for you is what makes it problematic.

> you absolutely can share information with them, making planning easier

if they company has a clear policy and is known for following it -- sure. otherwise it's "x days off for personal reasons".

[lukan]

Yes it depends. But the thing with a birth is, that the day is not clearly defined. Which is common knowledge and works in the companies I know(in germany though). With - when it is time, he needs to leaves that moment.

But when you say "x days off for personal reasons" - they would like a date.

[gsich]

Like I said. If it comes to that it's a toxic workplace.