[systemvoltage]

I disagree, my father ran a small business (physical goods) and the people in his company were almost like a family. They felt as such, we treated them as such, it was amazing...brings a tear. I cannot emphasize this enough: It was far better relationship than resentful people on HN who are constantly complaining about work. They were happier as a whole.

[notaustinpowers]

Your father's business is an exception, not the norm. Also, complaining about work is as human of an experience as death itself. That's why it's called work...

[me_jumper]

That's not what I'm talking about. I mean companies that brand themselves as “was are a family” not where it comes from a genuine connection between the employees.

[hdivider]

Yes, sadly HN does seem to have a high proportion of folks who don't seem to understand the value of human connection. Everything is about technology.

But not all mission statements are meaningless, and not all attempts by executives to create a family-like culture come from a bad place.

Much of it comes from a good place, and it often works. But people who experience this I think are less likely to write on HN.

[AlexandrB]

> But not all mission statements are meaningless, and not all attempts by executives to create a family-like culture come from a bad place.

Executives that make promises to their employees they can't deliver on should know better. You can't create a "family" out of your company because the realities of running a business make that impossible. It's fine to encourage mutual respect, etc as cultural values but it's important to make clear where the boundaries are or people will be hurt (either financially or emotionally) when you can't deliver. Saying the company is "like a family" is blurring these lines, not making them clear.

Edit: That's not even mentioning how "we're like a family" usually means "we're like a TV family". Many real families sometimes fight, swear at each other, say fucked up, sometimes racist/sexist/etc, things, talk about politics and religion, etc. Most larger companies would not tolerate any of this.

[JohnFen]

The reason I consider an employer saying "we are a family here" problematic is because it's obviously untrue.

My family will support me no matter what. My family will never fire me. My family actually loves me.

None of those things are true with an employer.

[pseg134]

Well sure if you approach the situation with a dictionary definition of family you will be disappointed. And to be honest your definition of family is from a hallmark card. That isn’t most people’s experience.

[JohnFen]

> That isn’t most people’s experience.

I don't think that either of us know what "most people's" experience actually is. With the people I've gotten to know over the years, that is the most common experience. Apparently, it's not with the ones you have gotten to know.

Both of us have a selection bias going on.

[e_i_pi_2]

In my experience the focus is on human connection and that why this criticism is here - this is a business which necessarily can't prioritize human connection over profit trying to motivate people to work more. I think it's all about the outcomes - if you say "we're a family - we give plenty of second chances and then help people find a new job" is very different from "we're a family, so you need to work late tonight to get this project done"

[chinchilla2020]

HN is also violently against social events at a company and the idea of social interaction.

Hate to break it to HN, but the most successful engineers I've met in the biz are also very empathetic and enjoyable to be around. This HN stereotype that you have to be an low-EQ, frustrated incel to work on software is incorrect in my reality. Just look at the top coders who are living (Linus, Guido, Hashimoto) and you will notice that they are very teamwork oriented people.

[TylerE]

Actions, not words.

From my experience, the more a company TALKS about being a family, the less it acts like one.

[clarkevans]

Benevolent ownership works well, till the owner passes on. Then all of the unwritten promises no longer exist.