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by habinero 1094 days ago
No, trying to better yourself is fine.

Following that advice isn't bettering yourself, you're essentially just doing the human version of SEO.

You aren't becoming a better or kinder or more interesting person, nor are you working on your ability to make real human connections with others.

And a lot of you will say, so what? If it gets me a girlfriend, what does it matter?

These are the dudes who get dumped or divorced and never see it coming, because they never bothered to learn how to relate to people.
1 comments
inconceivable 1094 days ago
> These are the dudes who get dumped or divorced and never see it coming

no, i do believe you have it exactly backwards.

you're also just making up straw man arguments like "can't connect with people". i didn't even mention that, or hobbies, or charity, or anything. pure fiction in your mind.

you see a post about 'self improvement' and your mind just fills in the blanks with your own assumptions. you probably didn't actually read half the post.

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habinero 1094 days ago
Oh, I read it. I'm commenting on what you chose to emphasize and what you left out, because that speaks volumes about what you value.

Almost all of the advice was around superficial, self-centered things.

All of it was about you getting something you want, and none of it was about being a net positive in someone else's life.

It comes off as cold and selfish.

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inconceivable 1094 days ago
yeah, so you took something i didn't say, and just made it up. you even gave me an opinion on this made up topic. that's called a straw man. that's the literal definition of one. i know, you're probably the kind of person who doesn't usually commit logical fallacies. except when you do, of course. either way:

be fit, make money, don't be needy, dress well, be good at sex, work hard to overcome height/race, move past breakups, keep working to improve.

these are somehow selfish? HAHA okay buddy. then again, hey you know you could NOT follow my advice, and

be fat, broke, needy, schlubby, lame at sex, lazy, heartbroken, and give up.

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habinero 1093 days ago
If you want to do them, fine. But they're not going to make you successful at relationships, because everything about them has to do with you.
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