[sho_hn]

All these things have their own kind of logic to them. It's possible to learn/train people/empathy. There's a lot of people who can't get themselves to believe that it's worth investing, in though. But people skills do come in handy, also when solving non-romantic problems at scale.

[Kazrath]

It has little to do with lack of empathy. I've found the problem is far more to do with oversharing conclusions based on observations. Empathy is typically in hindsight. You expect the other person to be intelligent, observant, reasonable, and logical. What you did say is not something that would have offended yourself or other like-minded individuals. So when it does offend, the empathy kicks in and you realize your mistake. Which is often just over-estimating the other person.

[sho_hn]

Empathy as a skill is relevant in adapting the way you assert the same logical points toward a person, e.g. by taking their state of mind into account when it comes to phrasing, pacing, how much context to include. On the fly, with course-corrections.

If you want an engineering analogy, it's a bit like adding a suspension system to a wheel to improve traction.

It's very practical!