[millimeterman]

> I've encountered several people here claiming that stimulants don't get you high and that they aren't addictive.

Just because stimulants _can_ get you high and be addictive doesn't mean they will when taken appropriately. The only time I felt any kind of high from my ADHD medicine was the first day I took it. And I quite easily skip taking it on weekends, with the only side effect being that I browse the internet all day and struggle to do anything productive.

To be honest, I don't actually like being on stimulants. Methylphenidate made me feel like I was constantly in low-grade fight-or-flight mode and dextroamphetamine (which I'm on now) gives me mild emotional blunting. Plus both cause slight dry mouth, appetite suppression that I have to forcibly eat through, and insomnia if I take them too late in the day. Not to mention the fundamental hassle of taking pills every day within narrow bands of time, something I regularly procrastinate and/or forget. (Also, I have tried taking higher/double doses as you suggested earlier when I was figuring out my optimal dose. They just made me feel jittery and on edge - not exactly pleasant.)

If I had no ambitions or responsibilities, I would be more than happy to throw my medicine away and sit around on my computer all day every day. Unfortunately, I do have ambitions and responsibilities and medication helps mitigate my crippling, career-threatening inability to get things done. So I'll take that tradeoff.

[operatingthetan]

>Just because stimulants _can_ get you high and be addictive doesn't mean they will when taken appropriately.

I'm definitely calling out inappropriate usage, so I don't disagree.

>Plus both cause slight dry mouth, appetite suppression that I have to forcibly eat through, and insomnia if I take them too late in the day. Not to mention the fundamental hassle of taking pills every day within narrow bands of time, something I regularly procrastinate and/or forget.

Yeah the side-effects are not great. Throw in teeth-grinding, compulsive behaviors, irritability, aggressiveness, etc.

>If I had no ambitions or responsibilities, I would be more than happy to throw my medicine away and sit around on my computer all day every day. Unfortunately, I do have ambitions and responsibilities and medication helps mitigate my crippling, career-threatening inability to get things done. So I'll take that tradeoff.

I'm happy to hear about your self control. I wish I were effective as a person naturally, I'm sure you can relate. Unfortunately they don't work for me as well as they once did.

[millimeterman]

> I'm happy to hear about your self control.

Actually, my self control is really quite bad. I'm terrible at doing difficult or unpleasant things and am very prone to low-effort, self-destructive hedonism. But as a result I have a very intense fear of addiction because I know I would struggle to pull myself back from it - I've never drank alcohol or done any recreational drugs for that exact reason. I was very hesitant about pursuing potentially lifelong medication, I requested the smallest possible starting dose from my doctor, and I don't intend to ever increase it beyond what I currently take (10mg/day).

On a philosophical level I still don't _like_ that I'm taking medication, but the benefits are significant enough that I tolerate it. And perhaps ironically, ADHD medicine actually helps me push past my lazy hedonism and do things that are necessary but dull.

(I would note that it doesn't make me _want_ to do boring things, nor do I think it's supposed to if dosed correctly. Even on medication, I'd still rather play video games than do work. But it at least makes it possible for me to sit down and work anyway. Whereas before, every day was an exercise in staring futilely at the screen while begging my brain to do literally anything.)

> I wish I were effective as a person naturally, I'm sure you can relate.

Very much so. I really wish my productivity wasn't dependent on medicine that

a) I need to remember to even take

b) Has annoying negative side effects

c) Is a controlled substance, with all the hassle that brings

But unfortunately, I guess that wasn't meant to be.