[trekkie1024]

I can sympathize with the author's experiences, though I find things like

One recent man had a lot going for him. In fact he was the most promising prospect I’d had in some time. But then he mentioned that he got his daily coffee from Starbucks, and I found it hard to imagine dating someone who liked Starbucks coffee; or even if they liked the coffee, didn’t find Starbucks so odious and soul-diminishingly ubiquitous they would never go there.

to be a bit much :D

[klipt]

> One afternoon, Nasruddin and his friend were sitting in a cafe, drinking tea, and talking about life and love.

> “How come you never got married, Nasruddin?” asked his friend.

> “Well,” said Nasruddin, “to tell you the truth, I spent my youth looking for the perfect woman. In Cairo, I met a beautiful, intelligent woman, with eyes like dark olives, but she was unkind. Then in Baghdad, I met a woman who was a wonderful and generous, but we had no interests in common. One woman after another would seem just right, but there was always something missing. Then one day, I met her. She was beautiful, intelligent, generous and kind. We had everything in common. In fact she was perfect.”

> “What happened?” Nasruddin’s friend asked, “Why didn’t you marry her?”

> Nasruddin replied, “It’s a sad thing. Seems she was looking for the perfect man.”

[georgeecollins]

I think that is the problem with modern dating. There is too much information and too many choices available so that it is easy to reject someone for something that is obviously trivial. In the olden days you would sometimes fall for someone as you got to know them better, even if they had a few flaws that made them seem imperfect. There is a great Russian movie "Moscow does not believe in tears" where the heroine says she will never date a man with dirty shoes. She meets a man with messy shoes.. (spoiler) eventually they fall in love.

[skissane]

> I think that is the problem with modern dating. There is too much information and too many choices available so that it is easy to reject someone for something that is obviously trivial.

You can go looking for the perfect person and never find them - or you can choose to be with someone and say “I’m flawed and you are flawed but we are going to try our hardest to make it work in spite of our flaws”.

[airstrike]

Or as go the lyrics to the great "When my time comes" by Dawes:

> Oh, you can judge the whole world on the sparkle that you think it lacks

> Yes, you can stare into the abyss, but it's staring right back

[ChildOfChaos]

I watched a video on YouTube recently that was actually on decision making, but it talked about arranged marriages.

With arranged marriages, the decision is made, so they have to make it work, for the rest of us, we think it’s the decision that matters more than anything else, so we place too much value on making the decision, as if a perfect one exists and place less value on making that decision work.

[munchbunny]

In her defense in that particular instance, she acknowledges that she had shallow reasons and that it had nothing to do with the man.

I can empathize with the author on this one, that sometimes your emotional interest in someone dissipates for superficial reasons, but no matter how much you rationally know it’s dumb, you also know it’s unlikely you’ll think yourself out of the hole.

[bitwize]

Sounds like a Seinfeld plot for one of Jerry's relationships. Bet this lady also goes "Sorry, I just don't see it working out. Not with your green bubbles."