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by kubb 1214 days ago
It's common for poorly adjusted people to develop a sense of superiority as a defence mechanism.
3 comments

But what if they're correct D:

Like how EU4 players feel toward Civ players

Value judgements can't be absolutely correct or false, they're only a reflection of a subjective value system.

Building a system in which you have value and others are stupid can help you cope.

>they're only a reflection of a subjective value system.

Damn

https://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=14

accepting that value systems are subjective doesn't lead to nihilism. you can still discuss ethics, for example based on widespread values
Or perhaps people are different and they find themselves pressured and bullied by “normal” people.
It's ok to be different, but thinking your better is often unhealthy and a symptom of trauma.
My issue is the claim that these people are poorly adjusted.

Perhaps these people are responding to other peoples sense of superiority. These other people don’t get called out because they are “normal” and we assume that normalcy is automatically superior.

Yes, and it is sad to see people thinking that something as universal as dancing (that literally exist in every culture in some form) is "not for them".

It sadly implies that this person went through bullying and rejection.

Why is it so difficult for you to accept that others don't share your taste? I've never been into dancing but decided to take some classes with friends because that sounded fun, and realised that I truly don't like dancing.

It has nothing to do with rejection. This claim that "you poor thing, if you hadn't been rejected you'd see how good this is" sounds really condescending.

What kind of dancing? Seems like not liking music, or not liking sex, or not liking outdoor settings. It's really hard to tell if you just haven't found the one that speaks to you yet. Maybe those two things are actually indistinguishable.
I think it's important to be sensitive here. There are people who don't like sex, and people who don't like outdoor settings either.

Now the age-old question is whether, with enough "opening up", they could. And yes, in many cases with enough therapy they could and would. But in other cases, therapy isn't going to achieve that. But regardless, doing therapy is essentially changing yourself to become a different person. And nobody is under the obligation to do therapy, or to grow or change or open up.

So I think it's important to be able to accept at face value that when someone isn't into something, whether it's dance or sex or the outdoors, they just aren't into it. Leave the door open so they know they're invited on your next hike, but zero pressure.

When people say they're not a math person, I don't pressure them to change, but I do recognize how self limiting and reductive they are being.

Everybody gets to make their own choices on what they will and won't enjoy in life, for sure. I'm not the type of person to apply pressure over something like that. But as someone who learned that physical intelligence is something you can grow in my 30s, I do feel it's a bit of a sacred duty to chip away at the same fixed mindset when I see it in other people.

There are people who don't gain any enjoyment from music. Or outdoor settings.
You could say the same about religion and a lot of other things. Still, no, thank you.