The worst thing you can do for a kid's intelligence is to let them think they are smart. I was led to believe I was smart as a child. The resulting intellectual cockiness I had... "I'm too smart for this shit." or "I don't need to study for this crap."
In the end, I don't really like to think about how far it set me back.
Absolutely. My experience was the same: my mother loved to talk to me about my intelligence and curiosity as if they were rare and therefore special.
Maybe it was true, but by telling me that, she accidentally laid the foundation of the rest of my life: I started distancing myself from my classmates, and eventually my peers.
By setting myself apart, I likely ruined myself without even realizing it. It turns out that my skills don't matter. A Carmack without a company is no Carmack at all. And now I've no ability with people, as he does.
- full stack programmer. My focus is always on the quality and robustness of the final design, regardless of which specific technologies/components are used. I learn them all.
- a deep knowledge of the details. I share Robert Morris' passion for understanding precisely what is going on at every level. My insight into the low-level details of next-gen CPUs came from reading the Intel architecture manuals several times over.
- an ability to achieve high-quality results within a very short period of time, regardless of the project or goal. If you show me a problem, I'll show you a solution by the end of the day, probably with a rough prototype. By a week, I'll have discovered which solution/direction is the best long-term strategy, and will have a working production version 1.
- I have good judgement. This turns out to be rare.
Specific technologies:
- a master of C/C++. I've been coding since age 12, and I'm now 23, so that's easily 30,000+ hours I've spent practicing. I've been writing C/C++ professionally daily since my first gamedev job in 2007. Python is my language of choice; Lua a close second, primarily when performance is of concern (such as in gamedev). But a language is merely a means to an end, and I work with all of them.
- several years of hobby experience writing Rails websites/Javascript. I write Lisp interpreters for fun. I want to write an Arc compiler someday.
- extensive sysadmin knowledge, both Unix and Windows. FreeBSD is my preferred OS for server-side deployment.
- master of realtime 3D graphics; both OpenGL and D3D. Given time and freedom, I can build you a renderer of the finest quality (equal or higher than Rage).
- artistic talent and taste. Several years of 3D Studio Max and Maya modeling and animation experience. I build next-gen character art (high-poly sculpt in ZBrush, then decimate / build low-poly shell in 3D Coat; project detail; touch up textures via Photoshop -> rig in 3DSMax -> animate -> import into game).
Projects:
- in highschool, wrote a game engine roughly equivalent to Quake.
- several game engines / game ideas.
- a full game editor, using C#/.NET WinForms.
- next-gen realtime graphics experiments, including realtime skin rendering (the same technique was recently shown by Epic in their "Good Samaritan" demo).
- several Rails websites. Made a system for schools to administer tests, with the intent of surpassing Blackboard. (JavaScript-based; this was back before "Ajax" was a fancy buzzword.) Tried to apply to YC with it. pg gave valuable advice (selling to schools is like selling to government; quality doesn't always win). Was invited to Hacker School though, which was fun (seeing Anybots' Dexter robot in person walk around on two legs was just awesome).
Dude, you're only 23. When you say you have no ability with people, what exactly do you mean by that?
When I was 23 I was more or less a complete moron with people, and for years to come. But it has improved to the point where I'm content. And I'm only 29 now.
If you were more specific about your problems with social interaction you'd probably get some good advice here.
> You could parachute him into an island full of cannibals and come back in 5 years and he'd be the king. If you're Sam Altman, you don't have to be profitable to convey to investors that you'll succeed with or without them. (He wasn't, and he did.)
More than that, I can't seem to inspire confidence in people. I don't know the cause, but it's proving lethal to my ambitions. As far as I can tell, it's the same situation Jobs found himself in:
> "You know, I’ve got a plan that could rescue Apple. I can’t say any more than that it’s the perfect product and the perfect strategy for Apple. But nobody there will listen to me.” [1995]
I don't know. I'm just enjoying life and pursuing my research. But it feels unsettling coasting like this. I have Carmack's technical skill; if only I could rally like-minded capable people who wanted to build the next Id or Epic, then we'd stand a fair shot at success, at influencing our industry and the world. We wouldn't be just another puppet for publishers. We'd have a shot at making an impact: the next Half-Life or Final Fantasy or World of Warcraft. The formula is good people + shared goal + time + rapid iteration + don't get distracted. It works, it's proven, and I've seen it happen firsthand at S2. We can achieve that same success.
But why should anyone take me seriously? I probably wouldn't, if I weren't me.
If nothing in here is exaggerated, then you don't need people skills. You should be able to easily find a problem to solve that will give you passive income, which will give you time to work on indie games.
Then, if those are as good as you claim, you will have enough concrete proof of skills to land a top slot at a game dev company (or just start/grow your own...) regardless of contacts or negotiating ability.
In other words, you don't need to persuade people to invest in you. You don't need to be "given a chance" or garner support. Just go do something kickass. It's impossible to argue with results.
Charisma and pedigree are over-rated. The problem seems to be that you think you can (or should) be good at everything. Embrace your strengths and find someone who is strong where you're weak. It might take some work to find that person (or team), but if it was easy, everyone would be doing it.
I can't help but think the same. Though it wasn't so much hearing it as going to a school that was far too easy. It's not even my grades that have suffered, but how much knowledge I may have let slip by because I just retained it long enough for the grade. On the other hand, the time saved from not studying for some classes has resulted in me picking up a lot of knowledge that I wouldn't have otherwise…
I think what matters most, if you haven't screwed up too bad (and it's hard to mess up that much, for most people on HN, I'd imagine), is that you step back, take a breath, and realize that you still have the potential. Then fucking work.
I think what's interesting is that he admits to having had no special inclination towards math before college. Only during college, and out of a fear of failure, did he become really good at math.
In the end, I don't really like to think about how far it set me back.