| I'm sorry to hear that you feel so crumby. In coming to us, asking for help with your problem, you demonstrate strength, in spite of feeling badly. Since you mentioned thinking of suicide, I must strongly recommend you talk to a mental health professional. If you don't already have an appointment, tell us your city and we'll come up with a resource for finding one in your area.
These can narrowly constrain your opportunities. If we know, we can perhaps offer more realistic help. Do you have:
money?
car?
housing?
physical disabilities? Legal problems?
(Of course, you're not required or compelled to share any personal details with us.) Once all that is addressed:
You need to focus on success in the place of focusing on failure.
You need to see that you can accomplish, yourself, a goal. Not knowing anything about you and your life, I recommend:
Goal: walk for an hour every day - in any number of shorter walks, if you'd like or have to. Steps: Preparation: P1. Cancel broadband service at home. P2. Get a small, blank notebook as a daily log. Daily actions: D1. Go for a walk. Out the door, or a bus or car ride away. Mall, abandoned train tracks, park, city streets, airport, your driveway - doesn't matter particularly. D2. Immediately after your walk, log your walk: date and time. D3. Shower, shave, dress neatly. No excuses on this one. D4. Go to a busy place for an hour. Bring pad and pen. No phone or computer allowed. D5. Immediately after your visit there, log it: date, time and place. Follow-up:
F1. Repeat this everyday this week. F2. Next Monday, check back with one/all of us. Hint: The goal is accomplishing the action, not having a feeling ("Happy!" "Fulfilled"). I look forward to hearing from you. |