[steamodon]

Hi, sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It sounds extremely similar to what I went through when my daughter was born. The most important thing to keep in mind is that it gets better. The first four months after my daughter arrived were the most unhappy I've ever been in my life, but after that things started to become easier and parental responsibilities felt more fulfilling.

I'd strongly recommend seeing a therapist. You might also want to see if you can arrange your schedule to get more sleep; I know it might seem counterproductive when you already feel a lot of time pressure, but sleep deprivation is absolute torture and makes everything worse. Getting my daughter on a regular sleep schedule was the single biggest life-satisfaction improvement I've ever experienced.

[princevegeta89]

Hi there, appreciate you writing here and the help, this means a lot. Any idea on how to find a therapist? Thanks again

[steamodon]

I guess my advice is US-specific, so apologies if this doesn't apply. I'm assuming you have health insurance either through your employer or your partner's. If so, they most likely have a portal that will help you find nearby specialists who are on your insurance network. Take a look there and research a few therapists, psychologists, or psychiatrists. You might have to meet a few before you find one who clicks. The good news is that many (most?) are doing virtual consultations these days, so there's a lot less friction to having a meeting.

[princevegeta89]

Thank you. Yes I am living here in California and my employer's insurance is decent. I will definitely make sure to try connect with one.