[sneeeeeed]

I read this whole shitty article and nowhere is there a convincing argument that mayonnaise consumption is even down. So I decided to double check the work of the journalist (quite necessary in this age) and discovered it up year over year.

The author of this piece just lied to us all.

https://www.statista.com/statistics/280777/us-households-usa...

[woodruffw]

It is exceedingly apparent from the article's tone and prose that it's satire.

[dang]

I took a quick look and wouldn't say it's exceedingly apparent.

[woodruffw]

Maybe I shouldn't press the point too hard, but the Millenials are Killing X[1] snowclone was already popular by 2016. That plus phrases like "Good ol' Mayo is the Taylor Swift of condiments", "some kind of deviant", etc. are a pretty big giveaway, at least IMO.

[1]: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/millennials-are-killing

[plorkyeran]

I got bored a few paragraphs in and nothing in that made me even suspect that it may be satire. The prose is the "poor imitation of the New Yorker" style that is very common in long boring and entirely serious articles.

[darkwizard42]

This is behind a paywall. Do you have a summary or a free link?

[wgj]

https://archive.md/roB5n

[p2t2p]

Just use "reader" mode and you'll be good