Why does my iPhone game, Thick Lips, suck in United States?

[eddylkh]

I am an indie iPhone game developer living in Hong Kong. I’ve developed the game “Thick Lips“. This game got pretty cool sales figures in Taiwan/Hong Kong, but not in US. Please take a look at the game (http://thicklips.eddyl.com), and comment to advise why the game sucks (and how to make it better) in United States. Thanks for your help

[chubs]

Keep in mind that the guys at rovio made 51 other games before they came up with the hit that was angry birds. The lesson is to keep trying until you have a hit :) I've got 6 apps out there, and for the life of me i can't pinpoint which ones will or wont succeed, you're not the only one scratching your head wondering. Good luck!

[wtracy]

I don't have an iPhone so I'm not able to try the game itself, but here's my thoughts.

I think there's nothing wrong with the game--it looks fine to me.

It's possible that people are put off by the name: "Thick Lips" sounds like it might be a racist slur against black (African) people.

More likely--and I really hope I don't sound too harsh--is the writing on your advertising. You are more than good enough at English to communicate clearly--I never had any trouble understanding what you were trying to say.

Unfortunately, the grammar is just enough "off" that it's clearly written by someone who is not a native speaker. (You make some small mistakes that native speakers rarely make, but you don't make any of the mistakes that native speakers usually do.)

Worse for you, most people in the U.S. have basically been trained that anything on the internet written by someone in Africa or Asia is probably a scam. Even if you convince them that it's not a scam, people in the U.S. seem to associate Chinese companies with low-quality products.

The good news is that you are already 90% of the way there. As I said before, your writing is clear and easy to understand. This is good because professional translators are expensive. :-) You just need to get a native speaker of American English to polish your writing.

I would suggest going to the English-language Google page (google.com, not google.cn or whatever you use locally) and searching for "copy editor". (In this context, "copy" means any writing that is meant for advertising.) In the advertisements on the right, I get several services that specialize in writing and editing for websites and advertisements.

Out of those, the sites I looked at were definitely built by people with above-average English skills. If they can edit and fix things by native speakers, they can definitely help you!

Good luck!

[eddylkh]

Thanks for your explaining the US culture. It helps a lot, especially for a Chinese like me who watches a lot of Hollywood movies without having been to United States.

I've tried searching the copy editor, and it seems it worth to try those service.

[randomanonymous]

Wack a mole type games have long gone out of style here. At theme parks, mini golf places etc there used to be many hands on versions of them,. Now everyone just want's to shoot stuff. Reason why even in video games, the wack a mole ordeal is pretty much 2 generations out of date.

My suggestion, is make it so you have to shoot the critters etc with a gun (or, less violent, with say a lazer gun/beam). Just my idea though. I'm sure others will chime in. It looks like you have done a pretty good job.

If you want to stick with the wack em game, without shooting etc, you could always make different artwork. Like wack it, Jersey Shore style, or Real Wrold wack it,.

[TuaAmin13]

I agree with this.

First off, I may consider a name change. Thick lips is ??? whereas Fat Lips means something different. I'm not too up on slang so I don't believe that means anything else other than "giving someone a fat lip" when you hit them. It also works for you because I think what you're getting at is the moles have thick lips. Not sure though.

For "Americanizing" it, you're probably going to have to play with the mechanics/sound effects/art. Wack-a-mole is nothing new; you may have to spice it up with something like bowling pins or baseball bats or chainsaws or ACME anvils or ??? (if you want to keep the melee aspect). I suspect that will keep people playing.

It's like the shooting fishing game that was featured a while back. Fishing games that drop a line is nothing new, but shooting the fish afterwards is novel enough that people will pay for it.

[eddylkh]

So, what's the difference between Thick Lips and Fat Lips? I am a Chinese who doesn't understand the language quite well. It seems Americans will use "fat" instead of "thick" to describe the lips?

Besides that, according to other comments, "Thick Lips" sounds like it might be a racist slur against black (African) people. Do you think "Fat Lips" will get rid of this issue, or I should try another completely different name?

Thanks for your brainstorming anyway :)

[carussell]

> Besides that, according to other comments, "Thick Lips" sounds like it might be a racist slur against black (African) people. Do you think "Fat Lips" will get rid of this issue

It's hard to say. You might want to look into changing the artwork, too:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Minstrel_PosterBillyVanWar...

I'm not sure I would have been put off by the artwork on its own, if I wasn't already aware of the name, though. So as far as that type of negative reaction, it's possible that you don't need changes there.

"Fat Lip" has no similar connotations, and a "fat lip" is used colloquially to refer to the swelling that happens when someone gets hit in the mouth, or more generally, in threats to beat someone up, so it should be apropos, actually.

[nhangen]

It's the name.

Thick lips sounds like a lot of things to a lot of different people, none of which are particularly flattering.

Fat Lips might be a better choice for this market.

[geuis]

Couple points.

1) The name isn't really descriptive of the game play. With the obvious caveat that many games, indeed, have names that don't relate directly to their content, many of the most successful ones do. Angry Birds, Halo, Super Mario Bros, World of Warcraft, etc.

2) The term "thick lips", while not directly insulting anyone, still has many negative connotations in the US of referring to folks of African descent. A similar scenario might be present if you made a game about collecting firewood and called it "Fags".

3) Your game might just be boring. (Please don't take this the wrong way as I haven't played your game)