| I don't have an iPhone so I'm not able to try the game itself, but here's my thoughts. I think there's nothing wrong with the game--it looks fine to me. It's possible that people are put off by the name: "Thick Lips" sounds like it might be a racist slur against black (African) people. More likely--and I really hope I don't sound too harsh--is the writing on your advertising. You are more than good enough at English to communicate clearly--I never had any trouble understanding what you were trying to say. Unfortunately, the grammar is just enough "off" that it's clearly written by someone who is not a native speaker. (You make some small mistakes that native speakers rarely make, but you don't make any of the mistakes that native speakers usually do.) Worse for you, most people in the U.S. have basically been trained that anything on the internet written by someone in Africa or Asia is probably a scam. Even if you convince them that it's not a scam, people in the U.S. seem to associate Chinese companies with low-quality products. The good news is that you are already 90% of the way there. As I said before, your writing is clear and easy to understand. This is good because professional translators are expensive. :-) You just need to get a native speaker of American English to polish your writing. I would suggest going to the English-language Google page (google.com, not google.cn or whatever you use locally) and searching for "copy editor". (In this context, "copy" means any writing that is meant for advertising.) In the advertisements on the right, I get several services that specialize in writing and editing for websites and advertisements. Out of those, the sites I looked at were definitely built by people with above-average English skills. If they can edit and fix things by native speakers, they can definitely help you! Good luck! |
I've tried searching the copy editor, and it seems it worth to try those service.