Mystery and intrigue can be a good way to build hype. On this occasion I felt less intrigued, and more bewildered.
To play the intrigue angle, you should be very concise with the text. Three or four bullet points, a relase date, and a mailing list form. Nothing more.
Your site has quite a lot of text, but all of it dances around the core point without directly addressing it. If anything it made me slightly angry. I invested time reading all of your site, and really I had nothing to show at the end of it.
The truth is that I don't "play" anything on purpose.
I haven't yet reached the technical level to be able to offer something concrete and complete.
Today, the idea was more to do a test post on HN (which is good since I learned that the pages to collect emails are forbidden) and to receive feedback on the technical part.
I'm sorry for wasting your time and I thank you for wasting more time to tell me that you waste time in an "inception" comment spiral of time wasted.
I take all your advices if one day I want to build hype and mystery around something, thank you a lot !
Leaving aside grammar/spelling/weird choice, it's not clear what this is for or why someone would want to sign up. Landing Pages usually a landing page for a thing - it's not clear what the thing is here (other than something having to do with liking UBI, I guess?).
No, please, don't leave that aside :) The French version is really convincing from my opinion and 5 external opinions. It's a translation problem.
"it's not clear what the thing is here"
As i mention in an another comment, as long as I haven't managed to reach the technical level I want to reach, it's difficult to say more without being incomprehensible.
... But, apparently, it won't be worse than now :D
See this share as a way to warm-up the thing : I will be better next time !
- 01.10.2020 (today): publication of the ROI project’s landing page. It's the first time I publish something online I coded from scratch - I profoundly love this feeling : this is so satisfying !
- I started coding on July 2020 and this landing page is made only in vanilla JS, CSS and HTML boosted with Gulp sauces : result of my summer self-taught frameworkless learning.
- ROI is my 6th project and will mix all my experiences from the last twelve years. All of them were launched under the "early-shipping" rules.
- This time, I aim to become the CTO for learning purpose.
- I will keep my idea under "not clearly stated" status until its released : even if it goes against the dynamics of indies, MVP, lean-startup… I have specific reasons which I explain here : https://community.indiestack.co/t/root-rise-of-indies-versio...
Nothing new will be launch beyond this Landing Page until β-version, around March 2021.
I am looking forward to read your feed-back - be rough, I haven't had any "dev-hazing" yet - about :
UX/UI
Copywrite (English is not my mother tongue).
Responsive
General appearance
Feels like something’s missing.
You had me hooked with the copy - it’s really intriguing but then it sort of just goes to a opt in form with no explaination about what you are offering? I’m confused and a bit disappointed.
It saddens me to know that you feel that way, sincerely.
I would have liked to show more, but I'm absolutely not "technically" ready.
By posting ROI, I wanted to get some criticism about the technical and aesthetics side first since it's my "hello world". I am not really looking for subscribers (otherwise I have to upgrade my account).
That was more just to see if everything goes fine with a bit more traffic than me refreshing the page :D
Don’t want you to feel sad! All you need is to describe what it is you are doing. Even at a high level. I’m building a XYZ. The page is otherwise 99% there.
> I will keep my idea under "not clearly stated" status until its released : even if it goes against the dynamics of indies, MVP, lean-startup… I have specific reasons which I explain here : https://community.indiestack.co/t/root-rise-of-indies-versio...
This link just takes me to a login form. Not sure if that’s intended/expected.
I'm part of this super active Indie hacker community since august and I am totally convincing by how its run.
However, you have to sign-up and pays a small contribution to discuss with us. It's worth it only if you are an indie hacker/side-project builder/... I guess.
And behind the paywall, you will find the complete explaination of the project Rise-of-Indies.
(As it's more "intimate" and that I don't want to expose every details of my thought on HN, It's a great choice)
If you want to know more about it, there is a place for that which is the link I shared. It's an add-on, not a trick.
What I was asking to the HN community is more the technical side of my page. I know there are lot of dev here and that could be a great way to improve my skills.
I've been working digitally for 12 years (creating project with no-code tools or people with dev skills), and I've never written a line of code. So this is the first time I write code and then publish it.
To play the intrigue angle, you should be very concise with the text. Three or four bullet points, a relase date, and a mailing list form. Nothing more.
Your site has quite a lot of text, but all of it dances around the core point without directly addressing it. If anything it made me slightly angry. I invested time reading all of your site, and really I had nothing to show at the end of it.