[vinbreau]

My daughter started Kindergarten and we're doing remote learning. She' almost 5 years old and can work a computer for the things she needs. But she can't work a zoom meeting. So I am a teacher's asst. from 8am until 2:30 pm. It's exhausting and sometimes I take a 2 hour nap afterward. It's hard on her because until a few weeks ago she would wake up, come into my office with me and watch shows on a laptop, maybe play some Minecraft. Now I wake her up instead, and prep her for school, which is in the same office she used to have fun in. She has been adjusting slowly, but it has not been without breakdowns on all our parts.

[topherjaynes]

Very similar experience here. It's been crushing to see how the remote is just draining for the kiddos. Seeing glimpses of hope and growth, but still painful at the same time.

[philsnow]

Depending on the state, education isn't compulsory until 6 or 7 years. Would it be an option for you to just hold off on the structured approach for another 6-12 months and let her play?

[redshirtrob]

I truly wish this were an option. I have an eight year old and a five year old. They play together wonderfully. But, since I can't let the eight year old have a gap year, I may as well have the five year old do stuff too.

The real pisser is my eight year old is one of those birthdays that can go one way or the other. She's currently the youngest in her grade. I'd love to give her a gap year from all this and just hold her back a year. She's only in the grade she is because our district in CA had strict cutoffs for kindergarten.

[9nGQluzmnq3M]

Young kids are not great at playing by themselves. Pretty much the only way to get a preschooler who can't read yet out of your hair for an extended period of time is to give them an iPad or TV.

[nitrogen]

This is better with more open space. A toddler I know can occupy himself for hours outside, but you have to keep a watchful eye for what he's getting into, so it's not as relaxing for a caregiver as a tablet or phone.

[asldkjaslkdj]

That's a scary prospect considering all the studies and news articles that say that putting your kids in school as early as 4 can result in life-long benefits.

It's hard to be a parent these days, you feel like nothing you do is ever "right".

[war1025]

> putting your kids in school as early as 4 can result in life-long benefits.

Giving a shit about your kids is mainly what results in life-long benefits.

The sad truth is a lot of parents either don't care about their kids or care about them only as a proxy of how it reflects back on them.

[Aeolun]

I find that hard to understand. Isn’t having a kid something you do exactly so you have someone to care for and nurture?

[prawn]

Yes, and for 51% of the time it's all a priceless, privileged joy. And the other 49% is you feeling guilty because you are short of time trying to parent, work, keep and maintain a house; you want to encourage a broader palate or cook once for everyone but they gripe about what you've cooked, antagonise each other, mess up the house in creative new ways, etc.

That's assuming you are an engaged parent and intended to have them.

I imagine school is an effective piece of the puzzle because it offers peers plus dedicated, trained professionals keeping everyone on track without having to also clean the house, take client calls, cook, etc.

Back up the comment chain though, I think in a year like this and at younger ages, you can relax any homeschool attempts. Months ago when quarantine peaked in South Australia, we took our kids out of school and had a very free-form program. Get up late, make bread together, do a bit of gardening, play Lego, building challenges, drawing, screen time, etc. Combo of bumming around at home with practical, learning activities. Fine by the kids and less stress for parents.

[war1025]

> Isn’t having a kid something you do exactly so you have someone to care for and nurture?

Ideally, yes.

In practice, not as often as anyone would hope.

Sometimes out of actual ill intent towards the kids.

Probably most times just due to parents being dealt a raw hand and them not having the wherewithal to give their kids the amount of attention they'd like to.

[s1artibartfast]

About 1/3 of children in the US were unplanned, and I imagine another (but not coincident) 1/3 are unwanted.

[9nGQluzmnq3M]

Citation needed. Most research I've seen says that it's the socialization and free play aspects that are important, not the academic content.

[adrr]

Our Kindergarten teacher made cut out images of all the buttons and walked each kid how to mute and unmute. It’s been a week and they seem to have gotten the conferencing part down. The other online tools is what we have problems with, they aren’t made for kids who can’t read. They slapped on some click to speak function that doesn’t work. Also all the services are overloaded and always throwing 500s.

[megablast]

You have trained your 5 yo to just watch shit on the laptop?? And you think that’s all perfectly fine?? Wow.