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by Aeolun 2134 days ago
I find that hard to understand. Isn’t having a kid something you do exactly so you have someone to care for and nurture?
3 comments

Yes, and for 51% of the time it's all a priceless, privileged joy. And the other 49% is you feeling guilty because you are short of time trying to parent, work, keep and maintain a house; you want to encourage a broader palate or cook once for everyone but they gripe about what you've cooked, antagonise each other, mess up the house in creative new ways, etc.

That's assuming you are an engaged parent and intended to have them.

I imagine school is an effective piece of the puzzle because it offers peers plus dedicated, trained professionals keeping everyone on track without having to also clean the house, take client calls, cook, etc.

Back up the comment chain though, I think in a year like this and at younger ages, you can relax any homeschool attempts. Months ago when quarantine peaked in South Australia, we took our kids out of school and had a very free-form program. Get up late, make bread together, do a bit of gardening, play Lego, building challenges, drawing, screen time, etc. Combo of bumming around at home with practical, learning activities. Fine by the kids and less stress for parents.

> Isn’t having a kid something you do exactly so you have someone to care for and nurture?

Ideally, yes.

In practice, not as often as anyone would hope.

Sometimes out of actual ill intent towards the kids.

Probably most times just due to parents being dealt a raw hand and them not having the wherewithal to give their kids the amount of attention they'd like to.

About 1/3 of children in the US were unplanned, and I imagine another (but not coincident) 1/3 are unwanted.