[madaxe_again]

To the dead comment:

Oh, I respect and empathise with everyone, even those I actively detest - but I also pity them, and can’t help but see them as poor fools who know not what they do - and as a result my politics sit firmly on the socialist side. I don’t think it’s fair that we have such ridiculously uneven distribution of intelligence, or wealth - and we can only address one of those.

I can’t claim that my psychology is either good or correct, but it is what it is.

As to “I think I have the world figured out” - I absolutely don’t. It’s an intractable and fascinating system, with more variables than one would believe possible. I’ll likely never have it figured out, and that’s ok - it gives me an indefinite wonder to contemplate.

I am, generally, quite happy being isolated - it saves me frustrating conversations with people who take offence at my observations, and is protective for my psychological well-being.

[slfnflctd]

Thank you for participating so much in this thread. I've gone through similar things in childhood, but took the 'other' path and ended up significantly lower-functioning than I thought I would be or was expected to-- drinking too much, avoiding people and responsibilities, generally just trying to scrape by on my own terms. You could say the system failed me, but it's usually not so simple... I also failed myself, and was impeded by a drive my parents instilled in me to seek 'higher knowledge' through religion, and later drugs (the latter leads one back to the former too easily sometimes). I was in my mid twenties before I finally came back around to a materialistic world view.

Fortunately, I have a partner who - in part resulting from their own childhood obstructions - is incredibly supportive, as well. It chills me to think of all the kids out there who feel trapped in an inscrutable world that doesn't seem to understand them. I like to think putting your words out there helps some.