[nashashmi]

Another definition of pressure?

> behaviour of people and how they constantly invalidate me... Reality can just hate a person.

... That you can't escape.

> like putting a downpayment on a house and people refuse to consider it medical treatment.

[sysbin]

What's your definition of pressure? I'm under the assumption you attach it to anything. Also I'm offended.

[nashashmi]

So you faced social pressure to be a certain person. And were exiled because you did not fit. And then your method of escaping that by using medicine was not good enough.

So you face this endless pain and don't have an escape.

[sysbin]

I don’t agree with how you phrased it. It’s more that reality just despises some people if simplified to the root. Since none of us has any real control when it comes to anything.

[nashashmi]

You are clinically depressed, a persistent form of depression. That's like a force telling you to stay depressed. Because that has become your comfort zone. As another commenter pointed out, this is a problem that lies between your ears.

You can blame everyone from childhood to current trends for the situation you are in now. But for as long as you do not conform, you will feel like you don't belong. And so you will seek an escape, but there are none. So you will be tired. You won't have the energy to stay your own person, so you will be suicidal.

You are not trans as you like to believe. You are a human who wants to constantly fight your environment and not conform. Calling your self trans is just one way of doing that.

So stop fighting. Learn to live. Learn to love yourself. Just as you are. Without changing. Then learn to love those around you. Then the things around you. Then the ideas around you. Hate nothing. That is evil for you.

From the book 7 habits, proactive people love first and then feel love. No medicine or surgery can change that.

Finally, read Feeling Good by David Burns. I did. :)

[sysbin]

I'm getting assisted suicide in less than a year in Switzerland.

You seem to be a very shallow person with no depth to write what you have. Seems like you're an evil force I've encountered by fate and similar as other forces i've experienced but I prefer that label for what's best described by the word faith.

People live through whatever is destined and some are just worse off than others because we live in a society under the illusion of free will by religion.

[nashashmi]

We are free to believe what we want to believe. We are free to do as we wish. We have that mercy from our Lord.

What happens to us is not of our wish. It is of his. How we react is in OUR hands.

Don't kill yourself. Just because you believe the world should be treating you a certain way but it is not, is not a good reason to die. It is selfish.

You took up resources in this world. In a first world nonetheless. You took away someone else's opportunity to have what you have. You need to give back. And giving up does not do that.

We live for others. We live for community. We live to bring others happiness. We live to protect others from the problems we faced. We live to rescue others from what we were rescued from.

From the beginning of your comments, you get offended. You don't like things being phrased a certain way. You don't like what you hear. True judgement is not embedded in your emotions. It is when you are free of it. But you are not. So it remains that your judgement is compromised.

You called me an evil force. When I only help you find reasons to live. You commit to suicide. And then instill in others reason to die. What is evil here?

A long time ago I made a comment here on HN. You should read it. Free yourself from ego, arrogance, entangled thoughts, and so on. Read: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=14439600