[thanatropism]

Ever heard of German toilets? I don't know if they're prevalent anymore, but the rather than being preemptively filled with water, the classic German toilet is dry so you can inspect your stool and then flush it with a strong current of water.

I've heard one person who migrated to Germany as an adult say it's because German cuisine features all kinds of sausages which can give you stomach parasites. But I might be paraphrasing this story to the point it's inaccurate.

[mr_overalls]

Maybe I'm being provincial, but if your food standards leave you regularly inspecting your own stool for parasites before flushing, you might want to reconsider them.

I hope your source was joking with you.

[NikolaNovak]

I don't know that it's just "German" - it's the kind of bowl I was used to in Europe before moving to Canada.

I am still not convinced that I enjoy the gentle splashback as the stool hits the vastly over-generous lake of water in most public toilets :-/

[thanatropism]

This is literally the first modern internet meme, but you can avoid that unfortunate effect by first setting a leaf-thin layer of toilet paper on top of the water.

[tripzilch]

But often I just really want to poop right away :)

Are you familiar with the paper napkins rolled up so tight they look like a peppermint, and when they get wet they unfurl? Maybe American toilets should have a jar of those things next to it on a shelf so you can quickly drop one in and go on with your business :)

For extra vintage meme, they should be shaped like sea shells.

[umvi]

> and then flush it with a strong current of water.

Reality: there is a porcelain shelf with a permanent poop stain on it because no current is strong enough to remove the smear