[Magmatic]

I think the best talk I had from a therapist in the early aughts went, "In general, the only things we know that help with depression are: exercise, some sunlight, a little social interaction, and self-care; bathing, brushing your teeth, etc. Medicine can help some but results are inconsistent, talk therapy is rarely helpful."

He spent two years just keeping me accountable on the little day to day things and while it didn't immediately cure my depression my quality of increased dramatically. The idea that something like keeping my room tidy would help with my depression sounded absolutely god damn insane at the time, "I want existence to end and you're telling me to make my bed?" ..but somehow those hundred small things mattered, life's pretty good these days.

God damn brains are dumb.

[Jtsummers]

I survived my deepest depression by showering and shaving every day. Then forcing myself to get dressed and go be with other people, even sitting in a coffee shop and feeling miserable, hiding it behind a smile and a book.

Being home, alone, unshaven, unclean, in an unkept house made me feel worse because of all the things I saw that needed to be done, and the isolation allowing me to think about that and only that.

A bit of tidying made my space feel better (less cramped) and a bit of tidying each day reduced the sense of burden compared to seeing the whole place as one big mess. Same for the self-care and other aspects.

Every undone thing is an extra stressor because it's an extra thing that you know needs to be done, but in a depressed state you do not feel able to do or that there is sufficient time to do (it seems overwhelming, even when in reality it's a small chore).

Being somewhat social (even as an introvert), being physically active and getting my sunlight, and maintaining a decently tidy home (I still suck at cleaning the shower often enough, and I never make my bed), have made an immense difference.

There's also the benefit of routine and ritual. That's part of what the showering and shaving did. I'm lying in bed and I haven't shaved yet, I need to shave, let's get up and shave. I have to do this, once it's done it's done and I can move on. Now I'm out of bed and I can maybe do something else or not, but the ritual helped force me out of bed and gave me even the chance to have a healthy day.

[wrycoder]

My suggestion is, instead of "making" the bed, pull the top sheet and covers down to the end and let the bed air out. It's easier and more healthy.

[tomjakubowski]

Your comment rings so true for me. I have had nearly the same experience with depression, talk therapy, and ritualistic self-care.

> (I still suck at cleaning the shower often enough, and I never make my bed)

I stopped using the top/flat sheet, which means "making the bed" is as simple as fluffing the pillows and shaking your duvet/comforter/quilt out over the bed. The flat sheet is responsible for probably 95% of the effort in making a bed. Coming home to a made bed is nice.

Bonus: when you buy sheets in the future, you can invest the top sheet savings into a comfier bedspread.

[chillwaves]

Keep in mind the flat sheet provides a barrier to protect your comforter from your gross body. Sheets are easier to wash than a comforter.

[kaitai]

In much of the duvet-loving world (but not the US), you just use a duvet-cover on the comforter, and wash that as you would the top sheet.

[fjsolwmv]

You spend a third of your life in bed. Please splurge on all the comfiest sheets and blankets you can manage.

[narag]

Excuse me if I stray out a little (I wholeheartedly agree with your comment) and ask you how is that your bed needs making. Are these things uncommon over there?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duvet

I hate making my bed so I can't be happier now :)

[DanBC]

People need to change the sheets and pillow cases and duvet covers. When some people are depressed they find these habits harder to maintain. After a while they've become deconditioned, and they're still unmotivated, and it can be hard to get back into a routine.

[narag]

Sadly I know. But you already needed to wash traditional bed dressing, actually one more sheet. The task of making the bed is much simpler with duvets, at least for me: I just take the thing with both hands, shake it a little and place it all over the bed. Compare that with placing correctly the upper sheet, the blanket and the covers. It's like ten seconds vs one or two minutes.