| > One of his big motivators is that dealing with people is hard, even for just the brief interaction of paying for his purchase. this is a fine line though. If you have some level of social anxiety, avoiding social contact is about the worst you can do for it. It's allowing the fear to control you. A better solution is to work your way through the social anxeity, learning organic ways to "grease the gears" and make situations pleasant to both parties. I had to learn this in my late teens/early 20s. I was withdrawing more and more, stone-faced all the time in public places such as the grocery store. I'd park behind the store just so I didn't have the hassle of interactions in the parking lot. That's letting anxiety reign over you. Cognitive distortions [1] can send you on a downward trajectory where avoidance is the norm and you to go greater and more extreme lengths to mitigate the "problem". I learned that a smile, saying "hi, how are you?" or "excuse me" seem to make most interactions at least 50 "percent" less uncomfortable compared to unemotional silence, which I've seen in psychology books as a sign of hostility. Now, if you are autistic and have something inhibiting your ability to understand social cues, then "just facing it" wont work, but even people on the spectrum can learn to improve their situation through a skilled therapist. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_distortion |
"Hello!" <clerk something something pleasant> "It's nice outside"
Now I understand the clerk would also rather just jam my shit through the scanner and point at the payment total and grunt.
I think of it as the chatter when two modems connect. Some noise and then a little signal then we are done.