| I'm going to post here under my real nick and hope you read my comments: I was in a depressive state for close to twenty years. The loss of my mother at 10 put me there and instead of getting better I settled into my depression for the next twenty. Twenty years. I was irritable and emotional. I had few friends and I made the friends I did have pay for their mistake of being my friend. I made bad decisions and burned bridges. I drank too much. I had zero good romantic relationships and was getting worse. My career, the one good thing in my life, had stagnated. Nobody wants to work with an asshole. SO one day, after breaking up with a girl, I finally decided to get help. I cried like a baby in the office of a therapist. She got me on medication and in four weeks I was a different person. I combined that drug therapy with talk therapy and completely turned my life around. It wouldn't be a stretch to suggest it's similar to hearing music for the first time or seeing color. I was able to smile and find joy in the world again. By almost every measure, my life improved. Things have only gotten better since then. I want you to seek help. Make use of the opportunity to completely change the trajectory of your life by getting out of the mindset you're currently in. If you need medication, take it. If you don't, invest time in talk therapy. Find a therapist you trust and who is competent. If you don't like the one you get, find another. DO THE WORK. Depression is like cancer of the mind. If you ignore it, it'll consume you until there is nothing left. Don't ignore it. My current happiness is only tempered by the knowledge that I lost so much along the way by ignoring my symptoms. Don't be that guy. We have a small amount of time on this rock. Make it worth your while. |