[Nrsolis]

Zoloft.

I had a very strong opinion about psychiatric drugs: I hated the idea of them.

But when you are desperate, you'll try anything. And I was desperate.

SO I made a bargain with myself: drugs for a maximum one year. No matter what happened, I'd only try the drugs for one year.

After one year I didn't need them any longer. I was able to understand when I was entering a depressed state and adjust. Knowing what "good" felt like helped me understand what bad" felt like.

That's the bit that causes the growth and why you need to combine talk therapy with drug therapy.

I got lucky and found the right combo for me; someone else might have to try a few combinations to find what works for them.

[foxhop]

I just started Zoloft, 10mg, 4 months ago. I was desperate, I just wanted to be happy for Christmas for once, for my children's sake and it brought me back.

(brought me back: ability to smile and laugh. Ability to find amusement watching television [even my wife's shows], ability to think at work. No longer staring out my window wishing everything would end)

I have not put in the work to find a talk therapist, I really think I'm ready to do that now, I'm going to follow up on Monday and find someone.

[Nrsolis]

Here is the thing: the drugs are like a cast or a crutch. They help you heal.

The talk therapy is like learning how to get strong so you don't break bones or lose balance and fall.

They go together. You can do talk therapy without the drugs but that didn't work for me. The drugs got me into the right frame of mind to understand and process emotions. I could be mindful and see when I was irritated because depression was creeping back in.

I don't think depression is something you completely cure. I think it's something you manage your way out of and keep at bay with constant effort. Mental hygiene practiced with a professional goes a long way towards making that happen.

Look, I discussed some really gut-wrenching things with my therapist. I dug deep. I did the hard work. It wasn't fun.

But today I'm able to live without drugs or weekly visits to a therapist. I'm effectively in remission. And let me tell you man: I'm HAPPY.