[sbilstein]

I moved to Seattle in 2011 and left in 2013. It was a little difficult to make friends at first because (1) people are generally standoffish and (2) the whole 'I work at Microsoft' thing really turns people off for whatever reason.

What I learned after a while was you can't really do anything about #1; thats just the NW culture. To deal with #2...just don't bring it up and don't be a stereotype and get to know Seattle and all it's good for. Music, mountains, etc. I loved living there the second year I was there.

I find the Bay Area is so inundated with tech it's almost impossible to encounter #1 or #2...almost anyone you meet socially if you live in SF will work for tech in some way or another which was not guaranteed at all in Seattle (also true of Oakland but not quite the same). People are friendlier in the Bay but that's got no bearing on you actually being friends with them.

[umanwizard]

So the solution to #2 is to be "one of the good ones"? To not talk about important facets of yourself to avoid offending petty people? Fuck that.

[mjevans]

You're missing the point.

The answer to number 2 is to be more than your job. To leave work /at work/.

[umanwizard]

I'm "more than my work". But that doesn't mean my work isn't a major part of me.

[wfo]

Your bathroom habits are a major part of you too, but that doesn't mean you bring them up in normal polite conversation. People aren't interested in hearing about your work (especially if it's in tech and they are not) just like they aren't interested in many details of your life which are very important to you. Your goal in social interaction should be to find common ground, not force people to want to talk about what you want to talk about.