[umanwizard]

So the solution to #2 is to be "one of the good ones"? To not talk about important facets of yourself to avoid offending petty people? Fuck that.

[mjevans]

You're missing the point.

The answer to number 2 is to be more than your job. To leave work /at work/.

[umanwizard]

I'm "more than my work". But that doesn't mean my work isn't a major part of me.

[wfo]

Your bathroom habits are a major part of you too, but that doesn't mean you bring them up in normal polite conversation. People aren't interested in hearing about your work (especially if it's in tech and they are not) just like they aren't interested in many details of your life which are very important to you. Your goal in social interaction should be to find common ground, not force people to want to talk about what you want to talk about.