[michaelt]

A lot of jobs involve what sociologists call "emotional labor" - jobs where, to be an effective worker, you can't always show your first-choice emotions.

If I'm at a table service restaurant and my waiter is visibly unhappy about having to bring us food and drinks, I don't want to be an asshole by keeping on making him do that. I'd rather cook my own food at home next time. But a table service restaurant where waiters aren't bringing customers food and drink is going to go out of business pretty soon.

That's why waiters are trained to engage in emotional labor - in saying "of course sir, it's no problem" when they'd rather sigh or complain; the emotional labor is actually an important part of the job.

Personally I've never hired a cleaner because I'd feel like an asshole asking some poor stranger to scrub my toilet. But if I did hire a cleaner, and they came around and left me feeling that yes, I am an asshole for hiring them to scrub my toilet, I probably wouldn't hire a cleaner again. If you're running a cleaning company, that's not good for business.

[unclebucknasty]

>I'd feel like an asshole asking some poor stranger to scrub my toilet.

I understand that sentiment and I was tempted to feel that way. OTOH, I realized that that sentiment in itself involved a certain amount of condescension, as it assumes that their means of making a living warrants my pity.

The service we use is owned by a very nice lady who also shows up to clean. She has an assistant and a couple of additional employees who clean other houses for her. To my mind, she is simply a fellow business owner who provides a service for a price. I hope that she is taking good care of her employees as well and, for our part, we tip to show our appreciation.

[ectoplasm]

That's an interesting concept... but doesn't it apply to every job?

[gohrt]

Only for customer-facing jobs. People don't care how much Bangladeshi children hate sewing shrts for them.

[ectoplasm]

Their boss doesn't want them to show emotional restraint?

[jacalata]

Their boss wants them not to stop working but (I imagine) could not care less if they cry or smile as they work. Do you agree it would be harder for them if they were required to smile and make small talk as they worked? If you want another example of not having to do emotional labor, think of a rock star who gets away with throwing tantrums at his manager or quitting halfway through a show - zero emotional restraint required.

[ectoplasm]

Workers cannot express (unrestrained) anger towards their boss. Can you? Rock stars cannot express anger towards their audience. I mean, I suppose they can, but it increases the chances of unemployment.