[lewisl9029]

Try something like this?

http://www.appacademy.io/#p-home

JavaScript/Ruby are very employable skills and there's no shortage of places that need them. If you have the time, I'd give it a try since there's nothing to lose (you don't pay them if you don't get a job).

[gargarplex]

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that OP probably doesn't have the appropriate cognitive disposition for programming as a career.

He referred to himself as normal; software programmers as a group have an IQ metric well above normal. BY NO MEANS am I suggesting that he is not smart; in fact, he should trust his feelings even more. Just because he is not a desirable programmer does not mean that he isn't welcomed by the tech community and industry; this thread is clear evidence of that.

There are many lucrative roles in tech that do not rely on programming as a primary activity.