[simon_]

I won't presume to tell you that you've evaluated your situation fundamentally incorrectly. If you've come to this point, I doubt that hearing "there is always hope" is going to sway you. Personally, I think you have the right to make whatever decision you like about your own life.

BUT: I know from my own life that it is easy to forget about the value of keeping your options open. Death really is permanent, and always available, so there is rarely a need to rush it. All kinds of unexpected good things really can happen... and if not... you can still kill yourself later.

SO: I'd suggest you make sure you adjust your thinking for the likely bias that you are undervaluing the option-value in all the unexpected good things you can't specifically imagine right now. If you have even a little uncertainty on this point... better to wait a bit and see, no?