[cwp]

This is funny, and probably very satisfying, but if you need to send this kind of email, you're doing it wrong. I get that other industries are different, but if you're looking for a job in the tech world, do your homework.

To (a small amount of) background research on companies that would fit with your situation. Find out what the open reqs are, and who the hiring manager is for each one. Pre-screen yourself by finding a req that you're qualified for and apply specifically for that job. Write a custom cover letter for each application, even if it's just an informal 4-line email. If possible, get a warm introduction.

If you do all that still don't get a quick response, move on without a second thought. You don't want to work for this company anyway.

[rbanffy]

You can, on your introduction message or on the thank you note you send after a first interview, state you understand the hiring manager is a busy person and you will get back in touch on a specific timeframe. And then you get in touch on that specific time.

If even this fails, you should fire the company - you really don't want to work there. As much as this is a fun read, unless you are applying for a job at The Onion, don't do it.