[kvcc01]

Your story is very sad, I'm truly sorry.

An important risk factor for career-oriented married men is total abdication of social efforts and leaving it to the spouse "to manage the social calendar." In the long run, this causes men's own friendships to atrophy. Then, if your spouse divorces you (or pre-deceases you), you find yourself without any functional support structure, which could trigger depression or worse.

I learned this from a book I read a while ago ("Lonely at the Top"), which tries to explain the causes of male suicide, especially among successful men. I vowed then, that if I get married, I'd make a very deliberate effort to maintain those friendships I had before the marriage. It's quite possible that someday, those friendships will be all that you may have left to rely on.

[judk]

This is so important, and one of the subtle reasons that the modern divorce-friendly culture adds dangers to men.