[dragonwriter]

> The contention is society's automatic assumption that it's better to give custody of children to the mother, as opposed to the father. That's why women end up with the kids the vast majority of the time

Or, the vast majority of the time, men use custody of the children as a bargaining chip to secure a better financial settlement, which is why they mostly don't end up with custody.

In contested divorces, there may be a presumption operating that the person who acted as the primary caregiver is most suitable custodial parent, and traditional gender roles means that that will often be the mother.

But that's not a gender-based assumption, that's a gender-neutral assumption applied to facts that happen to be influenced by traditional gender roles.

Now, if men who were the primary caregiver during marriage were generally losing custody in contested custody proceedings, that would be a different story.

[kidsthesedays]

I do wonder sometimes if men give up primary custody on purpose because they are afraid society won't think they are manly enough or something like that? I mean, pure hypothesis on my part.