[lotsofthrows]

> we might be trying to convince ourselves we "should" be enjoying our career circumstances even if we just don't. Those shoulds can certainly exacerbate depression. I'm just saying that your underperformance might also be an indication that you don't like your job, which is totally ok.

This is fair. My work has probably exacerbated my difficulties. In the past, work (or programming in general) has functioned as an outlet - something to focus on. At the moment, it's probably making things worse for various reasons. I will need to change my job soon, but feel the need to fix myself before I make any new commitments.