| First off; you deserve to be alive. Suicide is not a solution to anything. Life gets better, stick with it. I've dealt with depression my whole life as well, and have also had those feelings of anxiety and hopelessness. They are your brain playing a trick on you. It's not reality. What works for me is to focus on things that I enjoy, and to remember that killing myself will only hurt the ones I care about. I think about wanting to see my niece grow up, and one day be at her wedding, etc. Things like that. Specific things that matter to me, not just vague ideas about loved ones. I also try to throw myself into things I enjoy when I find myself starting to feel down. Listening to music I like, singing along to it helps me often. I make plans with friends. Not future plans, like immediate plans. If I find myself starting to feel down I will reach out to friends and try to make plans to see them ASAP. Even just to go to dinner or something. This often helps to refocus me on my relationship with them, and importantly, I listen to what's going on in their lives. I was doing marathon running for a while, running 5+ days a week and that did help as well. Unfortunately I fell out of the habit. If you can find a form of exercise that you enjoy, it definitely will help. But obviously you're only going to do it if you enjoy it. Another thing that is important is to try to adopt an open minded attitude about trying things. This has always been hard for me, but if I can do it, it really helps. If I can open myself up to trying new things, and remember that if they don't work out it doesn't really matter, that helps. New experiences at least make for interesting stories. Lastly, sometimes it can help to have a pet. My dogs' cheerful faces always brighten up my day. EDIT: Also keep talking to your doctors. |