[jseliger]

most of these cities are not affordable to live in when you have kids

This, however, is primarily a policy choice: http://www.amazon.com/Rent-Too-Damn-High-Matters-ebook/dp/B0... .

I'd like to see better designed suburbs that combine dense larger housing with public transit to connect the suburb communities with each other and the city they encircle

Me too. But suburbs have all the political veto problems described at the link above, but worse.