[max-a]

Well, on my rMBP I don't need to write a single line.

[tambourine_man]

You probably have a hardware problem or kext. Haven't had a KP in years.

[threeseed]

Take your laptop in and have it replaced.

Kernel panics don't just happen on OSX unless you have some third party driver that is misbehaving or far more commonly you have a hardware fault.

[Intermernet]

Neither should you have to: "It Just Works".