| >Here's a recent article about parents to a girl who try to fight all those pressures placed on her so that she's free to choose what she wants to do in life: No, that is an article about a couple who want to push their child away from what they consider "traditional gender roles" because they think they need to for some reason. There is nothing to indicate the girls was pressured to act like a girl. I may be old, but I can in fact still remember being a girl. I remember that girls could excel in school and be popular, but boys were "nerds" if they did well in school. I remember being selected as one of the "advanced students" to go learn about computers. I remember that there were only two boys selected. It is hard for me to ignore my experiences just because it is politically incorrect to be a woman who doesn't claim to be a victim. >By their very definition, cultural pressures are invisible That is not in the definition >So, step one: learn to see those biases. I've had that pushed on my many times. Imagine being a woman in university. I don't think you realize just how hard and how frequently it was pushed on me. But it was not about learning to see invisible biases. It was about learning to blame everything on biases that could not be seen, and you have to take it on faith that they exist. >That's just not true at all. What are you supposed to do when a woman tells you about her lived experiences again? >It's sad that you think so, because those proven, blah blah look I know better than you just shut up and accept my gracious help because I am a man so I clearly know better than you and you are just blind to it because you've only spent the last four decades living it Yes, please save me from the imaginary boogeymen. I need a big strong man to rescue me and assuage his misplaced guilt. |
... which she is being pressured into right and left by the movies and toys made for her.
> It is hard for me to ignore my experiences just because it is politically incorrect to be a woman who doesn't claim to be a victim.
Victim? Popular? What in god's name are you talking about? Sexism is as real and as scientifically proven as gravity. It doesn't make women victim, but marginalized. That is a fact regardless whether or not you think it's in vogue.
> That is not in the definition
Well, it immediately follows from it. The most basic building bricks of our own culture are almost always invisible from us as our internal organs are. We can easily see how other cultures work, but not our own.
> I've had that pushed on my many times.
If you don't want to you don't have to. Just as you don't need to learn about the French Revolution or Newton's Laws. You can choose to learn about whatever parts of our world you want to. But if you don't, don't argue out of ignorance.
> and you have to take it on faith that they exist.
No. Just tons, and tons and tons and tons and tons of research. No more than you need to "take it on faith" that the French Revolution actually happened.
> What are you supposed to do when a woman tells you about her lived experiences again?
I don't understand. If no one in your family has never been murdered, does that mean murder isn't a problem? Are we supposed to discard vast amounts of research -- from psychology, sociology and anthropology based on particular anecdotes?
> Yes, please save me from the imaginary boogeymen.
Not imaginary and not a boogyman. I just don't understand your argument -- if you don't directly feel, say, economic forces, are they imaginary? (Well, it's theoretically possible that the moment you close your eyes the world ceases to exist, or that we all live in your imagination, but I think that's not your working assumption.)
> I need a big strong man to rescue me and assuage his misplaced guilt.
I see that you, too, confuse sexism with misogyny. Well, misogynists hardly ever feel guilt. Sexists don't need to because they're not to blame (most women are probably as sexist as men). Sexism is a description of society as it came to be. There is no necessary conspiracy or ill-intent for sexism to blame, just as gravity is not "guilty" of killing people falling off of buildings. It's just there, and it's just as real. Unlike gravity, though, sexism (and racism) can be fought. I don't need to rescue you. I don't even know you. I think that society is going to be more interesting and more fun and a lot richer if all groups were able to participate in those places where power resides.