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by steven2012
4198 days ago
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I'm sorry for your mental illness. However, I feel like you would be insulted if I avoided replying to you because of it, so I won't. I think you must be doing really well for someone who is passing as someone without mental illness, so that it probably why you believe people don't notice it. However, my bet is that it leaks through, and there is something off about your behavior that you can't pick up on. Just because you're mild-mannered doesn't mean that there isn't something that rubs people the wrong way about your behavior. I've worked with a lot of people who were mild-mannered who behaved strangely and caused people to not like working with them. My bet is that this is likely the reason why you aren't getting job offers, as opposed to age. Because you are doing so well as someone passing as someone who doesn't have mental illness, you are probably hardcoded to believe that that's not the reason, but I would revisit that belief. |
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Yes you are correct that I do rub some people the wrong way. It's rather more subtle than you would think. For example I ordered a really tasty meal in an all-night restaurant once:
"Hey that supper I ordered is really good!"
"Are you going to be able to pay for it?"
"Well of course."
"I want you to pay for it RIGHT NOW!"
"Well OK..." I pulled what was clearly $25.00 in cash out of my wallet.
"Do you have enough money?"
"Wut? This is twenty-five bucks!"
However the waitress who actually served the meal was happy to chat with me the whole time I was there. It was the owner of the restaurant who seemed to think I could not pay, despite my having three times as much cash as what the meal cost.
There are only certain people who act that way towards me. It's uncommon but when they act like that, they are quite irrational.
I am dead certain that most people I meet in real life do not know I am mentally ill. There have been quite a few people who I have known for years, who were quite surprised when I finally told them about it.
Also, I am not the only coder who faces age discrimination. I was first warned about it when I was thirty years old or so. The age discrimination is widespread, it's easy to find others who have similar experiences.
Consider - have you ever seen an old person who works at an Apple Store?
Someone in a wheelchair?